Friday, September 21, 2007

Barry… Quit

Barry Bonds: “This journal will be one of my last entries as a San Francisco Giant. Yesterday, I was told by the Giants that they will not be bringing me back for the 2008 season. During the conversation with Peter Magowan I was told that my play this year far exceeded any expectations the Giants had, but that the organization decided this year would be my last season in San Francisco. Although I am disappointed, I've always said baseball is a business -- and I respect their decision. However, I am saddened and upset that I was not given an earlier opportunity to properly say goodbye to you, my fans, and celebrate with the city throughout the season as I truly believe this was not a last minute decision by the Giants, but one that was made some time ago. I don't have nor do I want any ill feelings towards the organization, I just wish I had known sooner so we had more time to say our goodbyes and celebrate the best 15 years of my life.”

Barry, please retire. You are an ass. You have embarrassed baseball. You have fictionalized the records. Peter Magowan does not want you. Bud Selig does not want you. I do not want you. Please, act humanely. Leave!

Racial Declaration: McNabb’s A Mockery

On Tuesday, HBO’s Real Sports interviewed Donovan McNabb. During his diatribe, McNabb lamented African-American quarterbacks existence. According to McNabb, “People didn’t want us to play this position.”

McNabb is pathetic. He is not a victim. He is a whiner. McNabb’s anguish is contrived. His suffering is self-inflicted. McNabb is a pretender. He lacks racial credibility. He should not represent the community. Concerning the African-American plight, Barack Obama can speak. McNabb should shut up.

Campbell, Young Challenge McNabb

Jason Campbell: “Early in my career in college, I felt like people looked at me differently and expected a lot more. I felt I had to do a little extra. At that point, I did feel that way. I don't feel that way now in the NFL. That's his opinion, and as an African-American quarterback, I have to support other African-American quarterbacks. But it's something I can't get caught up in. I look at all quarterbacks as the same. I support every guy who's playing the position. It's the hardest position to play in professional sports, and you get graded differently than any other position on the field. Nine times out of 10 the ball is in your hands, so everybody is watching you. Since you're in the spotlight, the mistakes get recognized. You need thick skin and a short memory.”

Vince Young: “I really feel like myself, black or white quarterbacks, we all go through something because that is the life of a quarterback. You have to be able to handle all the pressure and you have to be able to handle the losses and you have to be able to handle the media saying this about you. If you can't handle it, then you have to get off that position and go play something else.”

Betting the Pass Line (Last Week: 3-2 Season: 7-3)

Clemson (-7) at North Carolina State
Simply stated, the Wolf Pack is inept. The Tigers will cruise.

Kent State (-2) at Akron
Both are respectable squads. However, the Zips possess more offense.

Texas Tech (-6) at Oklahoma State
The Cowboys are 1-1. Troy shredded them. Graham Harrell should annihilate them.

Kentucky at Arkansas (-6)
Last week, Kentucky defeated Louisville. They cannot win again.

Georgia (+3 ½) at Alabama
Versus Arkansas, Alabama was fortunate. Georgia is underrated. Favor the Bulldogs.

Les Miles: Mouth Momentous, Mind Minute

Les Miles: “I think if you would review your own personal stance at how you report injuries - if it comes out of my mouth you use it. If it doesn't, if you root for your team and if in fact this is your team, then you would choose not to report anything that doesn't come out or described by me. I know that everything is news, but sometimes news doesn't help your team. I would encourage you to see it my way. You should be respectful of the team that you cover.”

Les, you are ridiculous. Reporters are independent. They have no allegiances, alliances, or teams. They are not yours. Reporters disseminate information. Information the public desires. Not information you choose. Obviously, reporters desire winners. However, they should not worship them. They should not respect you. You are not a coach. You are a joke. You are woefully unqualified. This underscores the aforesaid.

Eury’s Untimely Exit

On Thursday, Tony Eury Jr. announced his departure. Following Talladega, he will join Hendrick Motorsports. Eury’s decision is unacceptable. Tony, I understand your status. Obviously, you are sans motivation. However, your abandonment is wrong. You should reconsider. Finishing this season is the appropriate response.

Nashville Employs Successful Formula

Success breeds success. The aforesaid is not redundant. Occasionally, people embrace success. Often, they forsake success. Why? Novelty. People discard successful formulas. They cuddle the latest means. Never mind, the traditional means triumphs.

On Friday, I viewed FOX’sNashville.” Gary and Julie Auerbach’s (Laguna Beach) creation is watchable. The endeavor contains obnoxious elements. However, Laguna Beach staples salvage. Glossy females, music barrages, and stunted scenery generate a visual banquet.

Casting is acceptable. Mika Combs is adorable. Rachael Bradshaw is conniving. Conversely, Matt Jenkins and Clint Moseley are bland. They are nondescript. Overall, Nashville is not perfect. However, Nashville is viewable. Why? Nashville is enough of Laguna Beach.

The Art of Survivor

Amidst spectacular backdrops, “Survivor: China” premiered. Historically, Survivor has utilized location culture. However, this is their boldest venture. A Buddhist ceremony commenced the season. Both tribes received “The Art of War.” Both camps included rice.

Following their encampment, Fei Long (Flying Dragon) received immunity. Zhan Hu attended tribal council. Previously, Chicken’s opinions had amassed attitude. Via a 5-2-1 vote, he was eliminated.

NEW RULE

Hitler is never acceptable.

In New Jersey, two students loathed their school’s uniform policy. As protest, the pair dawned buttons. The buttons depicted Adolf Hitler. On Thursday, a judge ruled this appropriate. Hitler is appropriate? I cherish freedom of expression. These children were nonviolent. However, human decency exists. Hitler is never appropriate. One cannot argue this. Hitler slaughtered thousands. He was evil. Embracing him is repugnant and offensive.

Democrats Sidestep, Swallow

On Thursday, the Senate condemned Moveon.org (72-25). Subsequently, troop funding revocation failed (70-28). Concerning the former, Senators Hillary Clinton and Chris Dodd opposed. Senator Barack Obama abstained. They are repugnant. Concerning the latter, enjoyable Democrats?

Worth A Read

Pop Dirt

Music gossip and news. Currently, they are polling Vanessa Hudgens.

Maher Rips Conspiracy Theorists, Lactivists

Loser Loses

On Thursday, Floyd Landis’ doping was upheld. As punishment, Landis faces a two-year suspension. He must also forfeit the 2006 Tour de France title. Landis is offensive. He is revolting. Thankfully, this panel condemned him. Hopefully, he will disappear.

The Daily Smak

Hey, didn’t you used to be a DEI employee?

Officially, Amsterdam is closing their red light brothels. This is unfortunate. How will Britney Spears work?

On Thursday, fugitive fundraiser Norman Hsu was charged with fraud. Second occasion. Same charge. A Democrat who is consistent. Wow.

Seal Dribble

Monologue Joke of the Evening

“O.J.’s flight back to Miami was uneventful — he even flew coach, where reporters covered the trip. Reporter: “O.J. Simpson was like an average passenger on this flight — napping, reading, fiddling with his headphones — even watching ‘Ocean’s Thirteen.’ He’s even watching movies about robberies in Las Vegas. What is with this guy? Maybe he’s trying to figure out how to do it better next time.”

Jimmy Kimmel Live

Thursday, September 20, 2007

XOXO: Gossip Girl Spectacular

Teenage drama is not novel. Thus, a niche is required. “Beverly Hills 90210” was glamorous. “Dawson’s Creek” was analytical. “Laguna Beach: The Real Orange County” was realistic. “The OC” was imaginary. Amidst these endeavors, no one ever patterned youth’s greatest. No one ever mimicked “Cruel Intentions.”

On Wednesday, I viewed the CW’sGossip Girl.” The program is exemplary. The program channels Cruel Intentions. Beautifully, Gossip Girl balances lust, scheming, and self-destruction. However, a unique element exists… an omnipresent online blogging beauty.

Dialogue is excellent. Casting is exceptional. Leighton Meester (Blair Waldorf) and Taylor Momsen (Jenny Humphrey) are fantastic. Blake Lively (Serena van der Woodsen) and Chace Crawford (Nate Archibald) are also notable. Cruel Intentions was both decadent and delightfully evil. I am elated Gossip Girl has mirrored the example.

McCain Assails Ahmadinejad

Senator John McCain: “I think the president of Iran should be physically restrained if necessary. I hope it doesn't come to that but we're not going to have that kind of desecration of what is sacred ground. Obviously, it is a propaganda ploy on his part, and if we allowed him to do it it would just embolden his followers and give him the publicity he seeks. We all know that unfortunately because the United Nations is located in New York City, he can come there just as (Cuban leader Fidel) Castro comes and some other jerks. [This] would be an affront not only to America but to the families of our loved ones who perished there in an unprecedented act of terror.”

Child Perfection

Children are miniature people. The aforesaid is not repetitious. Obviously, they will mature. However, they are miniature people. As presently constituted, they are fascinating. They are likable and unlikable. They are personable and hostile. They are unique. They exhibit facets adults do not.

Last night, I viewed CBS’sKid Nation.” The venture is outstanding. Despite a controversial preamble, the program excels. Amidst a ghost town, children must lead, work, and thrive. They must also sacrifice modern and parental convenience. Specifically, last night’s dilemma. Eight outhouses or a television.

Reality television’s formula is simple. Personalities equal conflict. Kid Nation exemplifies this. There are inciting situations and inspiring stories. The bossy fourteen year old. The pageant peach ten year old. The eight year old, who exited crying. Simply stated, reality television is not perfect. However, Kid Nation reminds why the genre exists.

NFL Explodes Patriot Scandal

NFL: “The Patriots have fully cooperated and complied with the requirements of the commissioner's decision. All tapes, documents and other records relating to this matter were turned over to the league office and destroyed, and the Patriots have certified in writing that no copies or other records exist. League policies on in-game videotaping and audio communication will continue to be closely monitored and strictly enforced with all 32 teams.”

Back to You: Coveted Calamity

Expectations are devastating. Expectations cripple. They maim. They smother, stifle, and suffocate deserving opportunities. Expectations for life. Expectations for money. Expectations for love. Expectations for knowledge. They always assassinate. They never advance.

Last night, I viewed Fox’sBack to You.” Kelsey Grammer and Patricia Heaton headline the program. This comedy appeared perfect. I assumed I would love the production. Unfortunately, I did not. The illegitimate child storyline was stale. The jokes were obvious. The punch lines were pedestrian.

Grammer (Chuck Darling) was satisfactory. Ayda Field (Montana Diaz Herrera) was exemplary. However, Heaton (Kelly Carr) was mundane. Ty Burrell (Gary Crezyzewski) and Josh Gad (Ryan Church) were obnoxious. I love the concept. Sadly, I cannot watch again.

Game Balls (NFL Edition)

Derek Anderson (QB – Browns): 20/33, 328 yards, 5 td
(Win: 51-45 vs. Bengals)

Braylon Edwards (WR – Browns): 8 receptions, 146 yards, 2 td
(Win: 51-45 vs. Bengals)

Joey Galloway (WR – Buccaneers): 4 receptions, 135 yards, 2 td
(Win: 31-14 vs. Saints)

Edgerrin James (RB – Cardinals): 24 carries, 128 yards, 1 td
(Win: 23-20 vs. Seahawks)

Chad Johnson (WR – Bengals): 11 receptions, 209 yards, 2 td
(Loss: 51-45 at Browns)

Andre Johnson (WR – Texans): 7 receptions, 120 yards, 2 td
(Win: 34-21 at Panthers)

Jamal Lewis (RB – Browns): 27 carries, 216 yards, 1 td
(Win: 51-45 vs. Bengals)

Randy Moss (WR – Patriots): 8 receptions, 105 yards, 2 td
(Win: 38-14 vs. Chargers)

Willie Parker (RB – Steelers): 23 carries, 126 yards, 1 td
(Win: 26-3 vs. Bills)

Steve Smith (WR – Panthers): 8 receptions, 153 yards, 3 td
(Loss: 34-21 vs. Texans)

Game Balls (College Football Edition)

Michael Crabtree (WR – Texas Tech): 11 receptions, 244 yards, 3 td
(Win: 59-24 at Rice)

DJ Hall (WR - Alabama): 6 receptions, 172 yards, 2 td
(Win: 41-38 vs. Arkansas)

Mike Hart (RB - Michigan): 35 carries, 187 yards, 2 td
(Win: 38-0 vs. Notre Dame)

Stafon Johnson (RB – USC): 11 carries, 144 yards, 1 td
(Win: 49-31 at Nebraska)

Kellen Lewis (RB – Indiana): 19/24, 137 yards, 3 td; 18 carries, 199 yards, 2 td
(Win: 41-24 vs. Akron)

Rafael Little (RB – Kentucky): 27 carries, 151 yards, 1 td
(Win: 40-34 vs. Louisville)

Tim Tebow (QB – Florida): 14/19, 299 yards, 2 td; 18 carries, 61 yards, 2 td
(Win: 59-20 vs. Tennessee)

Steve Slaton (RB – West Virginia): 26 carries, 137 yards, 3 td
(Win: 31-14 at Maryland)

Rusty Smith (QB – Florida Atlantic): 27/44, 463 yards, 5 td
(Win: 42-39 vs. Minnesota)

Jonathan Stewart (RB – Oregon): 17 carries, 165 yards, 2 td
(Win: 52-21 vs. Fresno State)

Chris Wells (RB – Ohio State): 24 carries, 135 yards, 1 td
(Win: 33-14 at Washington)

John Parker Wilson (QB - Alabama): 24/45, 327 yards, 4 td
(Win: 41-38 vs. Arkansas)

Lauren Endures Awkward Moments

Amidst every high school, this scene has transpired. Opposing couples, opposite corners. They abhor each other. They discuss each other. Inevitably, one couple mocks their counterparts. One couple abandons maturity.

On Monday, Heidi and Spencer, Lauren and Jason attended Ketchup restaurant. Rudely, Spencer mocked Lauren and Jason’s relationship. Heidi and Spencer then ridiculed them. Jason contemplated confrontation. However, Lauren calmed him. Eventually, Lauren and Jason departed. The next day, Heidi’s misfortune continued. Elodie ignored her whining.

Lauren and Jason should relax. They are overly cozy. They should talk. However, they should not date. Lauren discussing potential activities, Jason discussing her purse… these conversations were awkward. Their post-Ketchup silence was uncomfortable. Concerning Heidi, her promotion was deserved. Her actions were ruthless. She should expect repercussions.

NEW RULE

Stop mocking mockery.

Last week, a “Leave Britney Alone” video went viral. Subsequently, “Leave General Petraeus alone” and “Leave OJ Simpson alone” videos have been posted. These distortions must cease. I love jokes. However, these videos are not jokes. They are MSNBC programming. “Leave Britney Alone” was humorous. The succeeding videos have been hideous. Particularly, “Leave OJ Simpson alone.” If America cannot mock Simpson, what is the point?

The Daily Smak

Hey, didn’t you used to be Secretary of Agriculture?

In Venezuela, President Hugo Chavez wants clocks ahead half an hour. His motivation? The CW’s Gossip Girl.

According to a study, ADHD drugs aid children’s educations. Interestingly, adults have similar drugs. Starbucks.

Monologue Joke of the Evening

“This is amazing to me. The jurors in the Phil Spector murder trial have reached an impasse. They cannot come up with a verdict. Now the defense is asking for a mistrial. A mistrial? I think that’s the whole problem. I think the jury missed the whole trial!”

The Tonight Show

Wednesday, September 19, 2007

Ruiz Deserves Worse

Earlier this year, Juan Ruiz raped Johanna Orozco. He was arrested. While on bail, Ruiz shot Orozco, hideously disfiguring her face. On Wednesday, Ruiz received twenty-seven years incarceration. This sentence is abhorrently inadequate. Ruiz committed horrific crimes. He flouted authority. He shattered multiple lives. Ruiz is not human. He is prime evil slime. Twenty-seven years is laughable. Ruiz warrants castration.

Simpson Free, Far From Guiltless

On Wednesday, O.J. Simpson plead not guilty. Officially, he was charged with kidnapping; assault, burglary, coercion, and robbery with a deadly weapon; and kidnapping and criminal conspiracy. Concerning this case, the circumstances are shady. The witnesses are sketchy. With that stated, Simpson is a train wreck. He may not have committed multiple felonies. However, he is not innocent.

Ahmadinejad Asinine

On Wednesday, Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad’s request was denied. Ahmadinejad’s objective? Laying a wreath upon Ground Zero. Ahmadinejad is an ass. Iran sponsors terrorism. On September 11, terrorists murdered 3,000. Ahmadinejad is not compassionate. He is deceitful, repugnant, and treacherous. His request disrespected every American.

Webb Withers, Democrats Defeated

On Wednesday, troop timetable legislation failed. Specifically, the bill required equal combat and comfort periods. As previously stated, the President is commander in chief. The Senate cannot assign or revoke soldiers. Senate Majority Leader Reid, Senator Webb, and Senate Democrats… fund the wars and shut up!

Johnson: Talking From His Tank

Tank Johnson: “I know that I'm not a risk. I'm a highly intelligent person and I take pride in a lot of things I do in life. Just like any other human being, I'm going to make mistakes and I've made mistakes. As far as the risk goes, I'm coming to Dallas to be a productive defensive lineman and to solidify what [team owner] Jerry Jones thinks of me. As far as it being a last chance, I'm so focused on making this a great experience and being a Dallas Cowboy that I'm not really too wrapped up in what chance it is.”

Tank, you are ridiculous. You are not a risk? Your reputation includes assault, firearms, and death. You are highly intelligent? On June 4, you were suspended for eight contests. On June 22, you were arrested for speeding and DUI to the slightest degree. You take pride in things? Such as? You have made mistakes? A mistake is insulting your girlfriend. Assault and murder are not mistakes. In Dallas, you will be a productive defensive lineman? You are a thug. Is this your last chance? Yes.

NEW RULE

Character counts.

On Tuesday, the Dallas Cowboys signed Tank Johnson. Johnson is suspended. He is ineligible for five weeks. Obviously, he was a necessity. Signing him was paramount. Jerry Jones desires victory. However, victory does not require character annihilation. The Cowboys are America’s team. Once, Troy Aikman and Emmitt Smith represented them. Now, Tank and Terrell Owens represent them. Winning does not require character. However, society does. They Cowboys should remember this. Otherwise, their star should emblazon a Crips bandana.

Junior’s Corporate Conversion

Next season, Amp Energy Drink, Mountain Dew, and the National Guard will sponsor Dale Earnhardt Jr. Additionally, Junior will drive number eighty-eight. During his Budweiser tenure, Junior amassed only seventeen victories. He also acquired an apathetic, carousing image. Hopefully, this corporate restructuring refocuses him.

JT: Britney’s My Past

Justin Timberlake: “I haven't spoken to her in years. There's no ill will. I have nothing but love for her. It's funny because we dated each other at a time. Wow, I haven't talked about this in a long time, this is interesting. We were teenagers. And I think that's basically the best way to describe what happened to us. I think she's a great person. And I don't know her as well as I did. What I do know about her is she has a huge heart and she's a great person.”

Worth A Read

Awful Announcing

Putting announcers on notice since 2006. Excellent local news utilization.

Yahoo Questions the NFL

1. New England Patriots: Have they ever been this good, this soon?

2. Indianapolis: How much better does this team look with Bob Sanders in the lineup, and can he possibly stay there all season?

3. San Diego Chargers: Are they still a legitimate member of the Big Three, or is it now just the Big Two?

4. Dallas Cowboys: With his size, speed and aggressive running style, shouldn't Marion Barber be the starter already?

5. Chicago Bears: Can this team get by on the two Ds: defense and Devin Hester?

6. Tennessee Titans: Hey, haters and fantasy geeks: If Vince Young is such a lousy quarterback, how does he always seem to have his team in position to pull out big games?

7. Pittsburgh Steelers: Is it just me, or is it starting to seem like the Rooneys have done it again?

8. Baltimore Ravens: When Brian Billick accused the Jets' defensive players of "illegally simulating the snap count" on Monday, how aroused was Bill Belichick?

9. Houston Texans: If Andre Johnson's knee doesn't get better soon, will the hard times return?

10. Denver Broncos: What does it say about today's NFL when a team which came thisclose to losing at home to the Raiders is still in the Top 10?

11. Washington Redskins: So do you Joe Gibbs-bashers still think the game has passed him by, or would you say he's finally catching up to it again?

12. Green Bay Packers: Will they finish with more victories than the number of players that most fans could name off their roster?

13. Seattle Seahawks: Matt, Shaun: Do you guys know each other?

14. Cincinnati Bengals: If Chad Johnson got beer spilled on him, what kind of shower would have been appropriate for the Bengals' defensive backs?

15. Jacksonville Jaguars: What would have been a more boring way to spend last Sunday: Watching the Jags beat the Falcons or Senator Tom Harkin's 30th Annual Steak Fry on C-SPAN II?

16. San Francisco 49ers: If his neighbor asked to borrow a box of sugar, would Mike Nolan trust Alex Smith to deliver it?

17. Arizona Cardinals: Think Ken Whisenhunt and Russ Grimm have had a slight impact on the running game?

18. Detroit Lions: With all due respect to Jon Kitna's deity-provoked return in overtime, isn't the real miracle that the Lions are 2-0?

19. Tampa Bay Buccaneers: Is Joey Galloway still that good, or is the Saints' secondary that atrocious?

20. Minnesota Vikings: Did we really expect a team quarterbacked by Tarvaris Jackson (four interceptions) and/or Brooks Bollinger (brutal fumble in overtime) to be a contender?

21. New Orleans Saints: Is it true that U2 and Green Day will return to the Superdome for Monday night's home opener and perform their newest tune, "The Saints Are Bumming?"

22. New York Jets: Hey, Justin McCareins, are you allergic to leather, or did you just get spooked by the whole O.J./seized football thing?

23. Carolina Panthers: How many touchdowns does Steve Smith have to score for the Panthers to have a chance against an AFC team?

24. Philadelphia Eagles: Can it really be this bad, or are Andy Reid and Donovan McNabb doing one of their rising-from-the-abyss things?

25. Buffalo Bills: When J.P. Losman says the Bills need to "open up the offense more in the beginning" of games, does anyone really disagree?

26. St. Louis Rams: Can someone please explain to me how a team with this many playmakers is averaging 14½ points a game?

27. New York Giants: Has Bill Parcells called yet?

28. Cleveland Browns: Hey, Romeo: If Derek Anderson is this good, why the hell did you open the season with Charlie Frye at quarterback?

29. Miami Dolphins: When Ricky Williams gets reinstated, how stupid would the Dolphins be not to play him?

30. Kansas City Chiefs: If I reminded you that this team made the playoffs last season, would you believe me?

31. Oakland Raiders: How many times does Josh McCown have to screw up before Lane Kiffin gives Daunte Culpepper a chance?

32. Atlanta Falcons: Yo, Byron Leftwich: Are you sure you want to climb aboard the S.S. Minnow?

The Daily Smak

Hey, didn’t you used to be sponsoring number eight?

Evidently, Belgium is for sale. Initially, E-Bay hosted the auction. Now hosting? Breakfast food countries.com.

According to a study, men are impulsive and women are moody. Upon hearing this, men were excited. Women called the surveyors assholes.

Monologue Joke of the Evening

“O.J.’s biggest objection in his robbery case, is that he is being held without bail. He says that if he were anyone else but O.J., he would have been released. If he were anyone else but O.J., he’d be serving life for double murder right now.”

The Tonight Show

Tuesday, September 18, 2007

Half Best

Finally! On Tuesday, the Federal Reserve sliced the benchmark interest rate. They cut half a point. Subsequently, the Dow Jones Industrial Average soared 330 points. Interest rates have needed sliced. The Federal Reserve’s actions were appropriate. They will encourage spending. They will save Christmas. Belatedly, I applaud the Federal Reserve.

Giving Everything to Win

On Tuesday, the Dallas Cowboys signed Tank Johnson. Clearly, the Cowboys lack a conscious. They abhor character. I understand Jerry Jones’ motivation. However, reputation is visible. As previously stated, Johnson is a thug. His actions have mimicked career criminals, drug dealers, and gangsters. Why sign him?

Birds Bite on Leftwich

On Tuesday, the Atlanta Falcons acquired Byron Leftwich. Leftwich signed a 2-year, $7 million contract. Personally, I support Joey Harrington. However, he has not performed. Leftwich can perform. His Jacksonville dismissal was repugnant. Leftwich deserved another opportunity. His presence will improve both Harrington and the Falcons.

K-Ville: Superb & Emotional

New Orleans is a magic eye puzzle. New Orleans is seen and unseen. Following Hurricane Katrina, Bourbon Street, Mardi Gras, and the New Orleans Saints have returned. However, devastation remains. Amidst the crumble and graffiti, aspirations, attitudes, passion, resolve, and resentments remain unheard.

Last night, I viewed Fox’s “K-ville.” The endeavor is exemplary. Occasionally, the action is overly dramatic. However, the setting and stories are captivating. They are emotional and heartfelt. Viewers must remember those horrific and wrenching weeks. Poignantly, a child encompasses the aforesaid. Rain still induces her crying.

Obviously, the city is a star. However, the characters and dialogue are also brilliant. Particularly, Anthony Anderson (Marlin Boulet). Perfectly, Anderson encapsulates New Orleans’ residents. They desire forward progress. Yet, they cannot forget.

Emmy Rehash

Drama Series
Prediction: “The Sopranos”
Winner: “The Sopranos”
(Despite their conclusion, victory was deserved. David Chase was correct. Music set their tone.)

Comedy Series
Prediction: “Entourage”
Winner: “30 Rock”
(Completely undeserved. Alec Baldwin and Tracy Morgan are television’s worst characters. With that stated, Tina Fey’s speech was hilarious. Dozens and dozens of views. Does NBC adore last?)

Reality-Competition Program
Prediction:
“American Idol”
Winner: “The Amazing Race”
(Slightly surprising. The program is great. However, Bravo is reality’s network.)

Lead Actor in a Drama Series
Prediction: Hugh Laurie “House”
Winner: James Spader “Boston Legal”
(The evening’s deepest category. Gandolfini was the sentimental favorite. However, Spader is deserving. Consistently, he outshines bizarre storylines.)

Supporting Actor in a Drama Series
Prediction:
Masi Oka “Heroes”
Winner: Terry O’Quinn “Lost”
(The evening’s weakest category. Given a full season, Imperioli would have won.)

Lead Actor in a Comedy Series
Prediction:
Charlie Sheen “Two and a Half Men”
Winner: Ricky Gervais “Extras”
(Thankfully, Baldwin and Carell did not win. Their programs are putrid.)

Supporting Actor in a Comedy Series
Prediction:
Jeremy Piven “Entourage”
Winner: Jeremy Piven “Entourage”
(Television’s best character. Piven is Entourage.)

Lead Actress in a Drama Series
Prediction:
Sally Field “Brothers & Sisters”
Winner: Sally Field “Brothers & Sisters”
(Her speech was repugnant. With that stated, her victory was warranted. Brothers and Sisters is underrated. This recognition was overdue.)

Supporting Actress in a Drama Series
Prediction: Chandra Wilson “Grey’s Anatomy”
Winner: Katherine Heigl “Grey’s Anatomy”
(Completely undeserved. Her acting is mediocre. Her storylines are pedestrian. Grey’s Anatomy is a floundering empire. Rewarding their failure will not help.)

Lead Actress in a Comedy Series
Prediction: Mary-Louise Parker “Weeds”
Winner: America Ferrera “Ugly Betty”
(Also completely undeserved. Ugly Betty is dreadful. Ferrera is television’s most overrated. She is hideous. She warrants cancellation.)

Supporting Actress in a Comedy Series
Prediction: Jenna Fischer “The Office”
Winner: Jaime Pressly “My Name Is Earl”
(Ridiculous. NBC is a fourth place network. Rewarding their stupidity, will not improve them.)

Lead Actor in a Movie or Miniseries
Prediction: Matthew Perry “The Ron Clark Story”
Winner: Robert Duvall “Broken Trail”
(Duvall is an exemplary individual. His speech was poignant.)

Lead Actress in a Movie or Miniseries
Prediction: Debra Messing “The Starter Wife”
Winner: Helen Mirren “Prime Suspect: The Final Act”
(Mirren is stellar. I love Messing. However, I cannot argue Mirren. She is articulate and elegant. She deserves every award.)

Chavez Purge

On Monday, Venezuelan President Hugo Chavez threatened education. If schools refuse oversight, they will be closed and nationalized. This illustrates Chavez’s peril. Dictators suffocate knowledge. They strangle opposition. They reeducate. Chavez is channeling Stalin and Mao. America knows their history.

Abizaid’s Assessment

General John Abizaid: “Iran is not a suicide nation. I mean, they may have some people in charge that don't appear to be rational, but I doubt that the Iranians intend to attack us with a nuclear weapon. I believe that we have the power to deter Iran, should it become nuclear. There are ways to live with a nuclear Iran. Let's face it, we lived with a nuclear Soviet Union, we've lived with a nuclear China, and we're living with (other) nuclear powers as well. War, in the state-to-state sense, in that part of the region would be devastating for everybody, and we should avoid it — in my mind — to every extent that we can. On the other hand, we can't allow the Iranians to continue to push in ways that are injurious to our vital interests. I believe the United States, with our great military power, can contain Iran — that the United States can deliver clear messages to the Iranians that makes it clear to them that while they may develop one or two nuclear weapons they'll never be able to compete with us in our true military might and power.”

I deeply respect General Abizaid. With that stated, Iran covets Israel’s annihilation. We cannot assume their intentions. Concerning deterrence, I concur. Concerning his rationalization, I do not. China and the Soviet Union lacked suicide bombers. America should avoid war. However, Iran is militarily miniscule. Diplomacy is the strategy. Yet, America must not overlook our own strength.

Similar Brews

Next season, Budweiser will sponsor Kasey Kahne. Budweiser is a corporate champion. Kahne is a public relations coupe. He is attractive and young. Essentially, Budweiser has not sacrificed. Kahne is Dale Earnhardt Jr.. Earnhardt was also an inconsistent driver.

Player Culpa

On Tuesday, National Football League Player’s Association President Gene Upshaw addressed pensions. He requested Congressional aid. As previously stated, NFL pensions are woefully inadequate. Players are akin to circus acts. Hopefully, Congress can assist.

Extension Deserved: Titans Keep Fisher

Occasionally, firings are the solution. However, firings can be punitive. If someone fails with talent, their firing is justified. If someone fails sans talent, their firing is unconscionable.

On Monday, the Tennessee Titans acted appropriately. Despite three successive non-winning seasons, Coach Jeff Fisher was retained. According to Fisher, Owner Bud Adams is a rational. “He understands you can't remain competitive if there's a catastrophic injury situation going on on your roster and those kind of things. He also understands the salary cap, and he understands there's going to be some lean years,” Fisher said. “He's excited as we are right now for the future of this team.”

During his career, Fisher has amassed a 111-98 record. He has scored four division titles. He has also garnered a conference championship. Despite this success, Fisher has struggled. Since 2004, the Titans are only 18-32.

Amidst five conference championship appearances, Bill Cowher logged five non-playoff seasons. Asinine owners would fired him. Art Rooney did not. Eventually, Cowher won a Super Bowl. I am elated Adams is emulating Rooney.

NEW RULE

Wash your hands.

According to a study, thirty-three percent of men utilize the restroom and do not wash their hands. Seriously? Each day, American men work, date, and shake hands. They do not wear signs. Honestly, which would be more repulsive? Discovering afterward the person did not wash or the sign? What would the sign say? “Hello. Please shake my hand. My hand just touched my penis. My penis was inside of your ex-girlfriend last night.”

The Big Five

For reasons good and bad… they were the news.

The Hot Five

A quintet of sizzling conversation starters.

Flesh Wow: Obama Girl Supports Our Troops

The Daily Smak

Hey, didn’t you used to be Hayden Panettiere’s boyfriend?

Officially, O.J. Simpson is without bail. Apparently, Simpson is a flight risk. Judge Obvious made this decision.

Today’s top five or largest NFL surprises (1) Houston Texans, (2) Detroit Lions, (3) San Francisco 49ers, (4) Green Bay Packers, (5) Washington Redskins

Monday, September 17, 2007

President Bush Nominates Attorney General

President Bush: “Good morning. I'm pleased to announce my nomination of Judge Michael Mukasey to be the 81st Attorney General of the United States. Judge, thank you for agreeing to serve.

The Attorney General serves as our nation's chief law enforcement officer. The Attorney General has an especially vital role to play in a time of war, when we face the challenges -- and we face the challenge of protecting our people on a daily basis from deadly enemies, while at the same time protecting our freedom.

Judge Mukasey brings impressive credentials to this task. In 1987, he was nominated by President Ronald Reagan to the United States District Court of the Southern District of New York. It's one of the country's busiest and most respected trial courts. He sat on that court for more than 18 years, and he earned the reputation as a tough, but fair judge. For six of those years he was the chief judge, and he was a sound manager and a strong leader. Throughout his time on the bench, Judge Mukasey was widely admired for his brilliance and his integrity.

Mike has experience in the Justice Department and private practice, as well as having served on the bench. He served four years as an Assistant United States Attorney in Manhattan, where he tried many cases and he developed expertise in the workings of the criminal justice system. He's also worked as a partner in a law firm, and he holds degrees from Columbia University and Yale Law School.

Some of Judge Mukasey's most important legal experience is in the area of national security. Judge Mukasey presided over the trial of the terrorist known as "the Blind Sheikh," and his co-defendants in the conspiracy to destroy prominent New York City landmarks, including bombing of the World Trade Center in 1993.

Before the 9/11 attacks, this was one of the most important terrorism cases in our nation's history, and the verdict in that case was affirmed on appeal. In affirming the convictions, the appeals court signaled out the judge for praise. I found it very interesting what they said. Here's what they wrote: "The Honorable Michael B. Mukasey presided with extraordinary skill and patience, assuring fairness to the prosecution and to each defendant, and helpfulness to the jury. His was an outstanding achievement in the face of challenges far beyond those normally endured by a trial judge."

When the World Trade Center was attacked again, Judge Mukasey quickly reopened his court, even though it was just blocks from Ground Zero. He recognized the importance of maintaining a functioning justice system in the midst of a national emergency. He and other judges in his district worked day and night to ensure that applications for warrants were processed, investigations could proceed, and the rule of law was upheld.

Judge Mukasey is clear-eyed about the threat our nation faces. As a judge and a private lawyer, he's written on matters of constitutional law and national security. He knows what it takes to fight this war effectively, and he knows how to do it in a manner that is consistent with our laws and our Constitution. And when confirmed by the Senate as Attorney General, he will work to ensure that our law enforcement and intelligence officers have the tools they need to protect the United States and our citizens.

When he takes his place at the Department of Justice, he will succeed another fine judge, Alberto Gonzales. From his days as a Supreme Court Justice in Texas, to his years as White House Counsel and as Attorney General of the United States, this honorable and decent man has served with distinction. I've known Al and his family for more than a decade. He's a dear friend and a trusted advisor. I will miss him and I wish Al and Becky all the best.

With Mike Mukasey, the Justice Department will be in the hands of a great lawyer and an accomplished public servant. Mike has shown good judgment in the courtroom, he's shown good judgment outside the courtroom. After all, he married a teacher. And we welcome Susan here, as well as son Marc and daughter Jessica. Thank you all for coming. He's also brought his sister, Rhoda, and brother-in-law Norm. I want to thank you all for supporting Mike as he takes on this important responsibility for our country.

It's a pivotal time for our nation, and it's vital that the position of Attorney General be filled quickly. I urge the Senate to confirm Judge Mukasey promptly. Until the Judge is confirmed, Assistant Attorney General Paul [sic] Keisler will serve as acting Attorney General. Accepting this assignment requires -- Peter -- I said -- Peter Keisler. Accepting this assignment requires Peter to delay the departure date he announced earlier this month, and I appreciate his willingness to do so. Peter is the acting Attorney General.

Paul Clement, who agreed to take on this role, will remain focused on his duties as Solicitor General, so he can prepare for the Supreme Court term that begins just two weeks from today. Judge, I'm grateful for answering our nation's call to serve. I look forward to welcoming you as the next Attorney General of the United States.”

Judge Mukasey: “Thank you, Mr. President. I am, of course, deeply honored to be selected as the nominee for Attorney General of the United States. Mr. President, I am also grateful to you for giving me the chance to return to the department of Justice where I served early in my career.

The department faces challenges vastly different from those it faced when I was an assistant U.S. attorney 35 years ago. But the principles that guide the department remain the same -- to pursue justice by enforcing the law with unswerving fidelity to the Constitution. I have always had great respect for the men and women who follow those principles day in and day out in all the constituent branches of the department. My fondest hope and prayer at this time is that, if confirmed, I can give them the support and the leadership they deserve.

This morning I received a congratulatory call from the man I've been nominated to succeed, Alberto Gonzales, and I appreciate his support and encouragement. I said a moment ago that the challenges the Department faces are vastly different from those we confronted 35 years ago. Less than a week ago, we marked a solemn anniversary that reminds us, if we need reminding, of how different those challenges are.

Thirty-five years ago, our foreign adversaries saw widespread devastation as a deterrent; today, our fanatical enemies see it as a divine fulfillment. But the task of helping to protect our security, which the Justice Department shares with the rest of our government, is not the only task before us. The Justice Department must also protect the safety of our children, the commerce that assures our prosperity, and the rights and liberties that define us as a nation.

I look forward to meeting with members of Congress in the days ahead, and if confirmed, to working with Congress to meet our nation's challenges. Thank you very much.”

FOX News: Move On’s Maturation

Here's a pop quiz on money in politics: Who gives more money to federal candidates, the National Rifle Association or MoveOn.org?

Answer: MoveOn.

And it isn't even close.

In the last two election cycles, MoveOn.org Political Action Committee spent more than $58 million in pro-Democrat political advocacy, according to Federal Election Commission records.

In just the 2006 election cycle, MoveOn.org spent $27 million in advocacy to elect a Democratic majority in Congress and used its formidable fund-raising clout to propel numerous Democratic challengers to House and Senate victories. By comparison, the NRA PAC donated $11 million in 2006.

"They give away and raise about three times as much as the National Rifle Association," said Massie Ritsch, communications director for the Center for Responsive Politics. "A tremendous amount of money, especially when you consider how quickly they came on the scene."

Founded in 1998 by Wes Boyd and Joan Blades, MoveOn.org started as an online petition to stop the impeachment of President Bill Clinton in the aftermath of the Monica Lewinsky sex scandal. Boyd and Blades, software engineers from Berkeley, Calif., posted a petition on the Internet seeking signatures for Congress to censure Clinton and "move on" to other domestic issues.

The online petition attracted like-minded liberals and MoveOn began a near-continuous dialogue with its members about what it should do to influence American politics. It created its PAC in 1999 and began attracting money for the 2000 campaign, raising, according to reports, $250,000 in the first five days and $2 million for the entire cycle.

Though impressive for its first cycle, MoveOn did not find its true voice or tap into deep-seated anti-war angst until after the Sept. 11 terror attacks.

"To combat terrorism, we must act in accordance with a high standard that does not disregard the lives of people in other countries," reads a petition drawn up by the organization after the attacks. "If we retaliate by bombing Kabul and kill people oppressed by the Taliban dictatorship who have no part in deciding whether terrorists are harbored, we become like the terrorists we oppose."

That dovish advocacy flowed seamlessly into MoveOn's campaign against the Iraq war, leading to a wider Internet following, bigger membership and larger contributions.

MoveOn continued its anti-war campaign after the invasion of Iraq and mobilized money and members in the 2004 presidential election, rallying around Howard Dean's campaign and helping propel him to front-runner status in the polls and shattering all previous online fund-raising records.

The 2006 election cycle thrust MoveOn into the ranks of potent pro-Democrat organizations. Never before had the group's ability to identify candidates and collect small donations on their behalf yield bigger results.

"MoveOn has grown into one of the biggest political action committees in the country," Ritsch said. "MoveOn collects money and says to its members 'We're going to pass that money along.' They're a conduit. They are aggregating and assembling all the money and pooling their resources so it adds up to big influence."

MoveOn backs candidates and asks members to send contributions on their behalf. They pass the donations on directly and handle all the paperwork.

"They're speaking for the grassroots," Ritsch said. "This is a form of bundling."

A quick tally of MoveOn-directed contributions in the 2006 election cycle, according to records compiled by the Center for Responsive Politics, offers a sample of the impressive size of its donations:

Sen. Robert Byrd, West Virginia = $834,211
Sen. Claire McCaskill, Missouri = $382,531
Sen. Jon Tester, Montana = $301,788
Sen. Sherrod Brown, Ohio = $287,622
Sen. Bob Casey, Pennsylvania = $160,780

Those contributions helped build a Senate Democratic majority as four of the five entered the Senate for the first time. McCaskill and Tester won razor-thin victories over well-funded GOP incumbents Jim Talent and Conrad Burns.

MoveOn-directed contributions also propelled several Democratic challengers to House victories, among them: Nick Lampson, Texas' 22nd District, $156,883; Tim Mahoney, Florida's 16th District, $145,334; Zack Space, Ohio's 18th District, $141,298; Michael Arcuri, New York's 24th District, $129,685; Joe Donnelly, Indiana's 2nd District, $123,035, and Tim Walz, Minnesota's 1st District, $102,657.

"They can help you a lot if you're a (MoveOn) candidate," said Byron York, White House correspondent for the conservative National Review magazine and author of "The Vast Left Wing Conspiracy," a book on powerful liberal groups and their organizing practices.

"They live by the $25, $50 and $100 contributions. They have become a real powerhouse in Democratic circles. The smaller the contributions, the more people it takes to come up with a big amount of money. They can legitimately say they represent a large segment of the Democratic primary electorate," York said.

MoveOn's clout was visible most recently in the muted and belated response from prominent Democrats in the aftermath of the organization's full-page New York Times advertisement last week questioning whether congressional testimony by Army Gen. David Petraeus, head of Multinational Forces in Iraq, would "Betray Us?"

On Capitol Hill, Democrats avoided the issue for days as did the party's top presidential candidates. Only after days and days of coverage did prominent Democrats declare the advertisement out of bounds.

MoveOn directs no contributions to Republican candidates or incumbents, instead avidly spending money against the GOP. It spent more than $2.5 million in 2006 in independent expenditures against Republicans.

House GOP incumbents who lost in 2006 and saw significant MoveOn independent expenditures against them can testify. Among those hardest hit: Charlie Bass, New Hampshire's 2nd District, $143,266; Chris Chocola, Indiana's 2nd District, $245,603; Melissa Hart, Pennsylvania's 4th District, $297,603; and Nancy Johnson, Connecticut's 5th District, $444,424.

Two House Republicans survived the MoveOn independent expenditure onslaught in '06, Rep. Deborah Pryce, who represents Ohio's 15th District, absorbed $417,623 in MoveOn wrath but won a narrow victory nevertheless. Pryce recently announced she will not seek re-election to a ninth term. Rep. Thelma Drake of Virginia's 2nd District won a second term with 51 percent of the vote after withstanding $529,535 in MoveOn independent expenditure torment, giving her the distinction among House Repubicans of taking the most expensive independent expenditure punch MoveOn threw in the 2006 campaign and living to tell the tale.

MoveOn also punishes Democrats who stray from their liberal, anti-war world view. MoveOn ran a radio ad against Michigan Democratic Rep. John Dingell when he announced his opposition to higher fuel economy standards for automobiles and light trucks.

The script of the brief radio campaign portrayed a conversation between a father and son about something called a Dingellsaurus. The child asks his father what that is. The script reads in part:

"Someone who's been in Congress so long, he forgets about the people who sent him there," says the father.

"Are there any around today?" asks son, Billy, to which the father replies: "Our own Congressman John Dingell. He's standing in the way of the first energy bill ever that would really combat global warming. It would also help the auto companies in the long run and that means more jobs."

"Is a Dingellsaurus dangerous?" Billy asks. The father replies: "Very, because if the Dingellsaurus gets his way, we could all be extinct."

Earlier this month, MoveOn ran a brief television campaign against Washington Democratic Rep. Brian Baird after he returned from a trip to Iraq and announced the Bush troop surge may be achieving important military gains. The ad featured an anti-war Iraq veteran. The script reads in part: "Keeping American soldiers in Iraq for an indefinite period of time being attacked by an unidentifiable enemy is immoral and irresponsible."

It asked viewers to "Tell Rep. Baird: Support Our Troops. Bring Them Home."
"Just because MoveOn only supports Democrats doesn't mean it supports all Democrats," Ritsch said.

FOX News: Hillary Care 2

Democratic presidential candidate Hillary Clinton on Monday proposed a health care plan that would require every American to have health insurance just like states require drivers to buy auto insurance.

The so-called "individual mandate" — the centerpiece of her "American Health Choices Plan" — would cost the federal government $110 billion a year and would help provide coverage for 47 million Americans without health care coverage. It is similar to a proposal offered by rival John Edwards. Barack Obama's health care plan does not have the same mandate.

"I believe everyone — every man, woman and child — should have quality, affordable health care in America," the New York senator told an audience in Iowa, vowing to accomplish the goal in her first term.

Clinton's plan is comprised of four main pillars:

Offering new coverage choices for the insured and uninsured and guaranteeing quality coverage;

Lowering premiums by removing hidden taxes, stressing prevention and increasing security by ensuring that job loss or family illness won't lead to a loss of coverage;

Promoting shared responsibility among individuals, providers, employers and government, and forcing insurance and drug companies to end discrimination based on pre-existing conditions and price gauging; and

Ensuring affordable health coverage for all by providing tax relief, limiting premium payments to a percentage of income and strengthening Medicaid.

The senator's proposal comes 13 years after her first effort was abandoned, a plan that was unprecedented for a first lady, both in its scope and criticism.

"Perhaps more than anybody else I know just how hard this fight will be," Clinton said, adding that she is awaiting the pile-on from Republican critics.

"I know my Republican opponents will try to equate health care for all Americans with government-run health care. Don't let them fool us again. This is not government-run," she said.

Clinton said she has learned from the 1990s experience, which almost derailed Bill Clinton's presidency and helped put Republicans in control of Congress for years to come. Aides say she has jettisoned the complexity and uncertainty of the last effort in favor of a plan that stresses simplicity, cost control and consumer choice.

Clinton's opponents were quick to meet her expectations. A spokeswoman for Rudy Giuliani called the plan "HillaryCare 2.0."

"Clinton’s latest health scheme includes more government mandates, expensive federal subsidies and more big bureaucracy – in short, a prescription for an increase in wait times, a decrease in patient care and tax hikes to pay for it all,” Giuliani spokeswoman Katie Levinson said.

"Hillary care continues to be bad medicine," said Republican Mitt Romney, who introduced universal health care while governor of Massachusetts "It's government in Washington, as opposed to states. It's government plans opposed to private plans. It's raising taxes as opposed to holding taxes level. It's not the right course to solving our health care problems."

The Massachusetts plan requires the same individual insurance mandate as Clinton's and uses state subsidies to help reduce the cost of private coverage. Since then, Romney has said he would leave it up to the states to decide whether they supported such a mandate.

Edwards too suggested that Clinton's prior fight has not prepared her for the challenges of today. “The cost of failure 14 years ago isn’t anybody’s scars or political fortune," he said. "It’s the millions of Americans who have now gone without health care for more than 14 years and the millions more still crushed by the costs."

"My universal health care plan would go further in reducing the punishing cost of health care than any other proposal that's been offered in this campaign," said Obama.

He also took a swipe at the Clinton administration's closed-door sessions on health care in the 1990s, saying "the real key to passing any health care reform is the ability to bring people together in an open, transparent process that builds a broad consensus for change."

Clinton's plan builds on the existing employer-based system of coverage. People who receive insurance through the workplace could continue to do so; businesses, in turn, would be required to offer insurance to employees, or contribute to a government-run pool that would help pay for those not covered. Clinton would also offer a tax subsidy to small businesses to help them afford the cost of providing coverage to their workers.

For individuals and families who are not covered by employers or whose employer-based coverage is inadequate, Clinton would offer expanded versions of two existing government programs: Medicare, and the health insurance plan currently offered to federal employees. Consumers could choose between either government-run program, but aides stress that no new federal bureaucracy would be created under the Clinton plan.

Clinton proposed several specific measures to pay for her plan, including an end to some of the Bush-era tax cuts for people making more than $250,000 per year. Edwards has vowed to completely repeal the tax cuts for high earners to pay for the cost of his plan, estimated at $90 billion-$120 billion per year, while Obama would pay for his plan in part by letting the tax cuts expire in 2010.