Betting the Pass Line (Last Week: 2-3 Season: 17-13)

Tennessee (+1) at Alabama
Despite glittering gaffes, both are adequate. Via a minimal margin, Tennessee will win.

Florida (-6 ½) at Kentucky
Last week, Kentucky defeated LSU. Florida should have defeated LSU. On Saturday, the Gators will upstage Kentucky

Michigan State (+19) at OSU
In their premiere test, the Buckeyes will win. However, the Spartans should compete.

Michigan (-1) at Illinois
Michigan is winning. Illinois is wounded. Favor the Wolverines.

Auburn (+10 ½) at LSU
Versus the spread, LSU has struggled. With that stated, this line is laughable.

Despite Explosions, Bhutto Escapes

On Thursday, suicide bombers targeted former Pakistani Prime Minister Benazir Bhutto. Reprehensibly, they killed 136. Why the attack? Bhutto is Al Qaeda’s nightmare. They are Muslim and totalitarian. She is female and democratic. Pervez Musharraf has sufficed. However, Bhutto is needed. She will challenge Al-Qaeda. She will improve Pakistan.

Craig Has Lost

On Tuesday, Matt Lauer interviewed Senator Larry Craig. During the dialogue, Craig was believable. The aforesaid is irrelevant. Craig is an embarrassment. He is a pariah. He can never recover. Therefore, he must disappear.

Cosby: Truth Trumps Color

On Sunday, NBC’s Meet the Press interviewed Bill Cosby. Candidly, Cosby addressed African-Americans. He discussed language, racism, and illegitimate children. Cosby is America’s uncle. Aged and slightly inarticulate, he has witnessed history. Cosby is not a turncoat. He is not a self-hating black man. Simply stated, Cosby is correct. African-Americans should heed his advice. Otherwise, they will never escape their ghetto.

Monologue Joke of the Evening

“1901, on this day, boxer shorts invented. May not mean a lot to you, but it sure eased the life of Rosie O’Donnell.”

Late Show with David Letterman

The Big Five (10/14)

For reasons good and bad… they were the news.

The Hot Five (10/14)

A quintet of sizzling conversation starters.

Despite Flaunting, Democrats Fail

On Friday, Democrats failed. They could not override the President’s veto. As previously stated, no one opposes insuring children. However, the Democrats were unseemly. A sixty-one cent cigarette tax increase is regressive.

Pete Stark Explodes

NEW RULE

Genealogy is ridiculous.

According to Lynne Cheney, Vice President Dick Cheney and Senator Barack Obama are cousins. I am not a scientist. With that stated, this is ludicrous. Disregard genetic markers. Open your eyes. They are related? Naturally, humans are curious. Therefore, genealogy is popular. However, genealogy has limits. Otherwise, the conclusions are laughable.

Worth A Read

Buckeye State Blog

Pamphleteers of the revolution. Viewers include activists, consultants, and candidates.

The Daily Smak

Hey, weren’t you running for President?

On Thursday, the Boston Red Sox defeated the Cleveland Indians 7-1. According to sources, Manny Ramirez was amused.

Today’s top five or next potential loser (1) Kansas, (2) Boston College, (3) Arizona State, (4) Hawaii, (5) Ohio State

Monologue Joke of the Evening

“The second annual Hip-Hop Awards were aired last night by BET. I noticed a theme in the opening announcements: ‘We’ve got David Banner, Busta Rhymes, Lil’ Boosie, Lil’ Mama, Lil’ Kim, Lil’ Jon, Lil’ Italy, Lil’ Debbie, Lil’ Orphan Annie, Lil’ House on the Prairie . . .’ It’s a Lil’ Palooza over there.”

Jimmy Kimmel Live

GAME BALLS (NFL Edition)

Tom Brady (QB – Patriots): 31/46, 288 yards, 5 td
(Win: 48-27 at Cowboys)

Kevin Curtis (WR – Eagles): 5 receptions, 121 yards, 1 td
(Win: 16-9 at Jets)

Brian Griese (QB – Bears): 26/45, 381 yards, 3 td
(Loss: 34-31 vs. Vikings)

Larry Johnson (RB – Chiefs): 31 carries, 119 yards, 1 td
(Win: 27-20 vs. Bengals)

Maurice Jones-Drew (RB – Jaguars): 12 carries, 125 yards, 2 td
(Win: 37-17 vs. Texans)

Adrian Peterson (RB – Vikings): 20 carries, 224 yards, 3 td
(Win: 34-31 at Bears)

Steve Smith (WR – Panthers): 10 receptions, 146 yards, 1 td
(Win: 25-10 at Cardinals)

Donte Stallworth (WR – Patriots): 7 receptions, 136 yards, 1 td
(Win: 48-27 at Cowboys)

LaDainian Tomlinson (RB – Chargers): 24 carries, 198 yards, 4 td
(Win: 28-14 vs. Raiders)

Wes Welker (WR – Patriots): 11 receptions, 124 yards, 2 td
(Win: 48-27 at Cowboys)

GAME BALLS (College Football Edition)

Josh Adams (RB – Wake Forest): 18 carries, 140 yards, 1 td
(Win: 24-21 vs. Florida State)

Anthony Alridge (RB – Houston): 24 carries, 205 yards, 4 td
(Win: 56-48 vs. Rice)

Donnie Avery (WR – Houston): 13 receptions, 346 yards, 2 td
(Win: 56-48 vs. Rice)

C.J. Bacher (QB – Northwestern): 41/58, 470 yards, 4 td
(Win: 49-48 vs. Minnesota)

Brian Brohm (QB – Louisville): 28/38, 350 yards, 3 td
(Win: 28-24 at Cincinnati)

Tashard Choice (RB – Georgia Tech): 37 carries, 204 yards
(Win: 17-14 at Miami-Florida)

Chad Hall (RB – Air Force): 31 carries, 256 yards, 4 td
(Win: 45-21 at Kansas State)

Graham Harrell (QB – Texas Tech): 30/37, 425 yards, 3 td
(Win: 35-7 vs. Texas A&M)

Ian Johnson (RB – Boise State): 28 carries, 205 yards, 2 td
(Win: 69-67 vs. Nevada)

Steve Johnson (WR – Kentucky): 7 receptions, 134 yards, 1 td
(Win: 43-37 vs. LSU)

Mario Manningham (WR – Michigan): 8 receptions, 147 yards, 2 td
(Win: 48-21 vs. Purdue)

Ray Rice (RB – Rutgers): 36 carries, 196 yards, 3 td
(Win: 38-14 at Syracuse)

Javon Ringer (RB – Michigan State): 29 carries, 203 yards, 2 td
(Win: 52-27 vs. Indiana)

Dantrell Savage (RB – Oklahoma State): 25 carries, 212 yards, 1 td
(Win: 45-14 at Nebraska)

Lucas Taylor (WR – Tennessee): 11 receptions, 186 yards, 1 td
(Win: 33-21 at Mississippi)

Taylor Tharp (QB – Boise State): 26/35, 320 yards, 4 td
(Win: 69-67 vs. Nevada)

From Here to Eternity

Deborah Kerr
(1921-2007)

The Final Surviving Member

Joey Bishop
(1918-2007)

Hills Liar’s Club

Friendships are cesspools. Yes, they encompass bliss, excitement, exhilaration, and happiness. However, they also include anger, betrayal, lying, and resentment. Friendships are life’s foundation. Occasionally, said foundation collapses and requires change.

On Monday, Lauren and Jen reconciled. During their lunch, they discussed rumors. According to Jen, Heidi blamed Brody. Subsequently, three confrontations occurred…Lauren versus Brody, Jen versus Heidi, and Heidi versus Spencer. Brody denied involvement. He blamed Spencer. Heidi denied involvement. She attacked Jen. Heidi questioned Spencer. Spencer did not deny.

Concerning Brody and Spencer, I trust neither. Both were involved. Who concocted or disseminated is irrelevant. Concerning Jen and Heidi, the question was correct. Heidi is irresponsible. Concerning Lauren and Jen, I hope they endure. Their friendship is exquisite.

Bird Exchange

On Wednesday, Bryon Leftwich supplanted Joey Harrington. Personally, I support Harrington. With that stated, the Falcons are apocryphal. Hopefully, Leftwich improves them.

NEW RULE

You cannot dance.

Lifehouse has released a “First Time” remix. Seriously? Clubs are stylish. Saturation breeds success. Unfortunately, “Big Girls Don’t Cry,” “Hey There Delilah,” and “Sober” are not dance tracks. I apologize for crippling artists. However, toleration has limits.

Hartley: Another Hasty Decision

On Wednesday, the Atlanta Thrashers fired Coach Bob Hartley. This season, the Thrashers were 0-6. Hartley’s firing is unfortunate. However, his exodus exemplifies NHL thinking. Resurrection is never an option.

The Daily Smak

Hey, didn’t you used to be SCHIP expansion?

According to Lynne Cheney, Vice President Dick Cheney and Senator Barack Obama are cousins. Interesting sack race combination…

On Wednesday, Many Ramirez said losing “is not the end of the world.” John Kerry responded “They said that about 2004.”

Iowa Forward

On Tuesday, Iowa Republicans advanced their caucuses. Their vote will now occur January 3. As previously stated, this catapulting is ridiculous. America deserves the premiere Republican and Democratic candidates. America does not deserve artificial winners. Unfortunately, the system has been decapitated.

Murtha, Democrats Respect Turkey

On Tuesday, Congressman John Murtha (D-PA) criticized the Turkey resolution. Additionally, six Democrats withdrew their sponsorship. I applaud these Democrats. Their actions were appropriate. This resolution is repugnant. Immediately, Speaker Nancy Pelosi (D-CA) should mirror their example.

The Unholy Alliance

Monologue Joke of the Evening

“Condoleezza Rice is negotiating an agreement between the Israelis and the Palestinians. That’s about doable as she is.”

Late Show with David Letterman

NEW RULE

Brides are not special.

Elana Glatt has filed a lawsuit. Why? Incorrectly colored wedding flowers. Glatt requested dark rust hydrangeas. She received pastel pink hydrangeas. Glatt is a lawyer. Americans adore brides. We cherish them. We accept their orders. They want a perfect wedding. We want their wedding perfect. Never mind, the event is irrelevant. Perfect weddings do not guarantee faithfulness. They do not prevent divorce.

Enough! Brides are women. They are not goddesses. They are not heroes. They are preening and spoiled. They do not merit adoration. They warrant screaming. Glatt warrants disbarment. In America, the divorce rate is fifty percent. Henceforth, brides should shut up.

T.I.: Rap, Gats, & Incarceration

On Monday, T.I. was charged with unregistered machine gun and silencer possession and firearm possession by a felon. Obvious question, when will rap learn?

Worth A Read

Auto Blog

Obsessively covering the auto industry.

Buccaneers, Chargers Score Steals

On Tuesday, the Miami Dolphins traded Chris Chambers to the San Diego Chargers. As reciprocation, the Dolphins received a second round selection. Additionally, the Kansas City Chiefs traded Michael Bennett to the Tampa Bay Buccaneers. As reciprocation, the Chiefs received an undisclosed selection.

Concerning the former, San Diego is brilliant. The Dolphins are ridiculous. Improbably, they have deteriorated. Concerning the latter, Tampa Bay’s deficiencies are obvious.

The Daily Smak

Hey, didn’t you used to be Sara Sidle?

Allegedly, Kobe Bryant has cleaned out his locker. Kobe’s plight is tragic. Once, he was a champion. Today, he is a janitor.

In England, a farmer has bred miniature pigs. Courtney Love calls them “mini-me’s.”

Monologue Joke of the Evening

“Campaign news: Hillary Clinton, so far, has raised $35 million. Here’s how they break that down: $5 million for advertising, $30 million for pantsuits.”

Late Show with David Letterman

Women’s Murder Club: Personality Present

Personalities shade drama. Their clashes and collisions darken drama. Their cavorting and conversing enliven drama. Great drama is a spectrum. Great drama is a color pallet of moods. These moods capture the imagination.

On Friday, I viewed ABC's "Women's Murder Club." The program is watchable. The estrogen is conspicuous. The pilot conclusion was suspect. The storylines are thin. With that stated, Women's Murder Club has personality. The dialogue is immaculate. The scenery is sharp.

The venture contains proficient acting. Angie Harmon (Lindsay Boxer) and Paula Newsome (Claire Washburn) are excellent. Tyrees Allen (Warren Jacobi) and Rob Estes (Tom Mitchell) are sound. Unfortunately, Aubrey Dollar (Cindy Thomas) and Laura Harris (Jill Bernhardt) are inferior. This reiterates my opinion. Women's Murder Club needs improvement.

BCS: OSU, USF, BC… WTF

1. Ohio State (7-0)
2. South Florida (6-0)
3. Boston College (7-0)
4. LSU (6-1)
5. Oklahoma (6-1)
6. South Carolina (6-1)
7. Kentucky (6-1)
8. Arizona State (7-0)
9. West Virginia (5-1)
10. Oregon (5-1)

Kingpins Collapse

(17) Kentucky 43 (1) LSU 37
During the third quarter, LSU led 27-14. Unfortunately, Les Miles’ play calling stagnated. Kentucky rallied. They forced overtime. They assumed the advantage. On their final drive, LSU ran four parallel plays. Quietly, Miles is accruing a reputation. He cannot win the critical contests.

Oregon State 31 (2) California 28
Within every season, injuries occur. Occasionally, injuries debilitate. On Saturday, California was sans Nate Longshore. With seconds remaining, Kevin Riley held the ball. He was tackled. Time expired. California’s undefeated campaign concluded.

Rice Rattles Russia

Condoleezza Rice: “In any country, if you don't have countervailing institutions, the power of any one president is problematic for democratic development. I think there is too much concentration of power in the Kremlin. I have told the Russians that. Everybody has doubts about the full independence of the judiciary. There are clearly questions about the independence of the electronic media and there are, I think, questions about the strength of the Duma. I talked to people about the coming months and how they see the coming months. How these two elections are carried out will have an effect on whether Russia is making the next step on toward democracy. Russia is a country that's in transition and that transition is not easy and there are a lot of complications and a lot of challenges. If Russia is to emerge as a democratic country that can fully protect the rights of its people, it is going to emerge over years and you have to be a part of helping the emergence of that Russia.”

NEW RULE

Stories require substance.

Senator Larry Craig will appeal. O.J. Simpson’s co-defendants may plead guilty. Britney Spears surrenders. Anyone watch the news? Exactly, what is a story? Segments have been prioritized. The Associated Press reports them. CNN televises them. Unfortunately, they are not news. They do not advance the story. They should not be reported. If this darkens the cable networks, I have no objection.

The Daily Smak

Hey, didn’t you used to be the National League Championship Series?

On Monday, rapper T.I. was arrested. Instinctively, Don Imus apologized.

Today’s top five or college football’s surprises (1) South Florida, (2) Kansas, (3) Arizona State, (4) Texas Tech, (5) Cincinnati

Cornhuskers Commit Duel Mistake

On Monday, Nebraska Athletic Director Steve Pederson was fired. On Tuesday, former Congressman and Coach Tom Osborne supplanted him. Concerning the former, Nebraska has been apocryphal. However, Pederson was scapegoated. Concerning the latter, Osborne is an arrogant, failed politician. His presence will not improve Nebraska.

Get Out Promptly?

Last week, Ohio Congressmen Dave Hobson (7th District) and Ralph Regula (16th District) retired. In 2006, Republicans were annihilated. 2008’s climate appears difficult. With that stated, not everyone should retire.

Line of the Morning

Congressman Steny Hoyer (D-MD)

“Never once in that quarter of a century has anybody on the Turkish government said this is the right time. In other words, there would never be a right time. If we forget what has happened... then we are at risk of letting it happen again.”

NEW RULE

Housework is healthy.

According to a study, housework is perilous. Evidently, cleaning products increase asthma risks. Seriously? I cannot mock asthmatics. However, this is ridiculous. The truth? America loathes work. We are slobs. We abhor cleaning. We detest formal dress. This is unfortunate. Americans should clean. Why? Spotless houses reflect personal pride. Proud people are happy. They do not fixate upon every fatal prospect.

Monologue Joke of the Evening

“Abigail van Buren, better known as Dear Abby, says she's for gay marriage . . . Dear Abby has come out for gay marriage. Which came as a tremendous shock to gay people — they had no idea she was still alive.”

The Tonight Show

Worth A Read

Purple Row

The Colorado Rockies are winning. They are blogging. Additionally, they are polling a World Series opponent.

The Avalanche Begins

The Daily Smak

Hey, didn’t you used to be undefeated?

This weekend, police arrested a three year old. The tot was driving. Angelina Jolie’s children are amazing.

According to a study, housework could be hazardous. Interestingly, Britney Spears said this about parenting.

Betting the Pass Line (Last Week: 2-3 Season: 9-11)

Bengals (-3) at Chiefs
The Bengals are miserable. The Chiefs are apocryphal. Preseason, the Bengals expectations were higher.

Dolphins at Browns (-5)
The Browns are improving. Derek Anderson is not Tony Romo. However, he trumps Cleo Lemon.

Raiders at Chargers (-10)
Currently, the Raiders lead the AFC West. LaDainian Tomlinson, please restore reality.

Patriots at Cowboys (+6 ½)
Both are 5-0. The Patriots will win. However, the Cowboys will compete.

Saints (+7) at Seahawks
My justification? As previously stated, the Saints must win.