The Daily Smak

Hey, didn’t you used to be driving number thirty-six?

Woodstock is available. The concert location is for sale. Coming soon… Peace, Love, and Starbucks.

Today’s top five or favorite teenage pastimes (1) sex, (2) drinking, (3) sex, (4) weed, (5) sex.

Handicapping the PGA Championship

Tiger Woods: 1.5-1

Zach Johnson: 8-1

Ernie Els: 9-1

Angel Cabrera: 12-1

Retief Goosen: 15-1

Sergio Garcia: 20-1

Vijay Singh: 25-1

Phil Mickelson: 30-1

Justin Rose: 40-1

Geoff Ogilvy: 50-1

Davis Love III: 60-1

Rory Sabbatini: 100-1

The Daily Smak

Hey Chief, didn’t you used to be fired?

Tonight, Logo, the Human Rights Campaign, and the Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual and Transgender Caucus will host a Democratic debate. Who’s moderating? Boy George Stephanopoulos.

According to TMZ, Kevin Federline wants additional custody. He seems sincere. He said Britney’s millions… definitely safer with him.

Barbara Morgan: Legacy & Launch

In 1986, Barbara Morgan watched Christa McAuliffe. She watched an unspeakable tragedy. On Thursday, Morgan and Space Shuttle Endeavor launched. Morgan’s ambition? Fulfill McAuliffe’s legacy. I wish her success.

NEW RULE

Republicans must embrace technology.

On Monday, Fox News and MSNBC reported Caroline Giuliani’s Facebook. On Tuesday, I excoriated them. I will now transpose. Democratic fundraising, Facebook as news, Youtube defeating George Allen... Why are Republicans ignoring technology? We are stupid. Our thinking obsolete. New media is efficient and free. Republicans require a revolution. The aged elites must cede power. They are killing our party.

Brady Unabashedly Real

Brady Quinn: “Believe me, I don't deserve anything. I think I have to earn a lot with the coaching staff but also with the team. But that's just something that you have to understand coming into it, especially as a rookie. You have to earn everything that you get. It's [contract negotiations] awful. You grow up loving the game that you've played and all of a sudden you're told you can't come in unless you sign a contract. To sit out from playing the game that you love for that long is horrible. It's nice just to be an official member of the Browns.”

Rookies espouse conscience and confidence. They are contradictions. With that stated, Quinn appears genuine. He seems dedicated and humble. Following his draft slide, I hope he succeeds. I hope he starts.

Worth A Read

Blog World Expo

The first industry conference, tradeshow, and media event. Sponsors include Blogger & Podcaster Magazine, Campaigns & Elections Magazine, Newstex, Pajamas Media, Townhall, and Yahoo.

Wake Forges Forward

On Wednesday, Wake Forest designated Dino Gaudio. Following Skip Prosser’s death, Gaudio’s task is unenviable. College basketball should cheer him. Personally, I wish him success.

NEW RULE

Teenagers drink.

According to a study, teenagers steal liquor. Obviously, researchers are geeks. However, did they skip puberty? Teenagers loathe rules. Why? They are arrogant. They are smarter. Parents know their children are drinking, fornicating, and smoking. They know alcohol, cigarettes, and drugs are available. They do not need studies. They need prevention methods. Scientists, stop studying. Start preventing.

Priest Pomposity

Priest Holmes: “This is about perseverance and having a great story to tell. I think that all the valuable years I've put into my tank, there's a lot in me still. I mean, we have what's called 'making it rain.' We have the dogfighting, we have so many things that have cast a negative light on the NFL. This is just a great story to show guys that regardless of what situation you're in, you can persevere.”

Holmes is an excellent running back. He is a prolific scorer. Obviously, he is truculent. Given his talent, he could supplant Larry Johnson. However, he will not rescue the NFL.

Worth A Read

Couture Candy

The sweetest fashions on earth. Posts include coupons, designers, and her picks.

Temp Logic

On August 7, Police Chief and National Guard Colonel John King was fired. On August 8, he was reinstated. Why the termination? King’s absence impaired his ability. King served our nation. His critics are correct. However, their solution was repugnant. Simply appoint an acting chief.

NEW RULE

Baseball must modernize.

On Monday, Major League Baseball Umpires rejected background checks. Clearly, Major League Baseball is stupid. Background checks are optional? I respect tradition. However, Major League Baseball is not traditional. Major League Baseball is draconian. Previously, they enslaved players and ignored steroids. Now, they blindly trust employees. Why? Major League Baseball must mature. They are a prestigious organization. They must act as this.

Davis Drops Mayfield

On Tuesday, Bill Davis Racing released Jeremy Mayfield. This season, Mayfield has accrued only eight starts. Mayfield’s failure is surprising. Seemingly, Mayfield possesses talent. Unfortunately, his statistics have never equaled expectations. Obvious question, is his career finished?

The Daily Smak

Hey, didn’t you used to be Baby Einstein?

On Monday, Total Nonstop Wrestling signed Pacman Jones. His first opponent? Tank Johnson…in an unemployment match.

Today’s top five or MTV favorites (1) Justin Timberlake, (2) Rihanna, (3) Gym Class Heroes, (4) Fall Out Boy, (5) Jay-Z

MTV Video Music Award Nominations

These are my rapid impressions. Justin Timberlake should dominate. Kayne West was overrated. The Best Group and Female Artist of the Year categories are loaded. Everyone should vote for “The Saints Are Coming.”

BEST GROUP

Fall Out Boy
Gym Class Heroes
Linkin Park
Maroon 5
The White Stripes

BEST NEW ARTIST

Lily Allen
Gym Class Heroes
Peter Bjorn & John
Carrie Underwood
Amy Winehouse

FEMALE ARTIST OF THE YEAR

Beyoncé
Fergie
Nelly Furtado
Rihanna
Amy Winehouse

MALE ARTIST OF THE YEAR

Akon
Robin Thicke
T.I.
Justin Timberlake
Kayne West

MONSTER SINGLE OF THE YEAR

Daughtry - "Home"
Fall Out Boy - "Thnks Fr Th Mmrs"
Avril Lavigne - "Girlfriend"
Lil Mama - "Lip Gloss"
Mims - "This Is Why I'm Hot"
Plain White T's - "Hey There Delilah"
Rihanna f/ Jay-Z - "Umbrella"
Shop Boyz - "Party Like A Rock Star"
T-Pain f/ Yung Joc - "Buy U A Drank (Shawty Snappin')"
Timbaland f/ Keri Hilson, D.O.E. & Sebastian - "The Way I Are"

MOST EARTH-SHATTERING COLLABORATION

Akon f/ Eminem - "Smack That"
Beyoncé f/ Shakira - "Beautiful Liar"
Gwen Stefani f/ Akon - "The Sweet Escape"
Justin Timberlake f/ Timbaland - "SexyBack"
U2 f/ Green Day - "The Saints Are Coming"

QUADRUPLE THREAT OF THE YEAR

Beyoncé
Bono
Jay-Z
Justin Timberlake
Kayne West

VIDEO OF THE YEAR

Beyoncé - "Irreplaceable"
Justice - "D.A.N.C.E."
Rihanna f/ Jay-Z - "Umbrella"
Justin Timberlake - "What Goes Around...Comes Around"
Kanye West - "Stronger"
Amy Winehouse - "Rehab"

BEST CHOREOGRAPHY

Beyoncé f/ Shakira - "Beautiful Liar"
Chris Brown - "Wall To Wall"
Ciara - "Like A Boy"
Eve - "Tambourine"
Justin Timberlake - "My Love"

BEST DIRECTOR

Christina Aguilera - "Candyman"
Beyoncé f/ Shakira - "Beautiful Liar"
Kanye West - "Stronger"
Linkin Park - "What I've Done"
Rihanna f/ Jay-Z - "Umbrella"
Justin Timberlake - "What Goes Around...Comes Around"

BEST EDITING

Beyoncé f/ Shakira - "Beautiful Liar"
Gnarls Barkley - "Smiley Faces"
Linkin Park - "What I've Done"
Justin Timberlake - "What Goes Around...Comes Around"
Kanye West - "Stronger"

Dems Smooch Labor

On Tuesday, MSNBC and the AFL-CIO hosted a democratic debate. This pander festival was pointless. Keith Olbermann was an adequate host. Soldier Field was an intriguing venue. With that stated, there were no winners. There were only applause hounds.

NEW RULE

Issues are relevant.

Last week, CNN discussed Hillary Clinton’s cleavage. Yesterday, Fox News and MSNBC reported Caroline Giuliani’s Facebook. The aforesaid are revolting. They are noise. Barack Obama’s Pakistan comments are relevant. Hillary Clinton’s healthcare proposal is relevant. Facebook and fashion are not. Bullshit is not. America and television, we are selecting a President. Act seriously. Stupidity’s consequences are horrific.

Roberts Recovering From Cancer Surgery

Robin Roberts: “I am incredibly grateful that my surgery went well Friday. Thanks for all the prayers — I owe you big time! My family read many of your e-mails while I was in surgery. It brought them such comfort. My big sis, Sally-Ann, marked all the survivor stories with a big S. I woke up in the recovery room with sweet Diane [Sawyer] gently tugging on my big toe. As you can imagine, I am still quite sore from the procedure and need to take some time for my body to heal. Right now the best medicine for me is to be at home surrounded by family and loved ones. I expect to get the final test results later this week, which will determine the course of my treatment.”

Roberts is an exemplary individual. Daily, she exhibits brilliance and class. The Roberts family has our thoughts and prayers.

Jones Flips Off Football

On Monday, Total Nonstop Action Wrestling signed Pacman Jones. Clearly, Jones is oblivious. During his suspension, Pacman should have vanished. Instead, he has flouted Roger Goodell. He has earned charges. He has selected wrestling. Officially, Jones career is concluded.

Pacman Speaks, Non-Wrestlers React

Pacman Jones: “I think wrestling is a great sport. You don't really give [wrestling] much [credit] until you get in [the ring] and try it. It will help get my mind off a lot of stuff that I'm going through. It's sort of a way to relieve some stress.”

Roger Goodell: “I've often said that it's not about what you say, it's about what you do. It's your actions. And I think the actions will have to determine that.”

Ben Troupe: “I hope it's worth it, and I hope it don't violate his contract either.”

Kyle Vanden Bosch: “He has to keep continuing to take the little steps to get in good favor with his teammates and this organization. I don't know what kind of step this is. It can be a good step. He also has to take steps to rehabilitate his image with the public.”

Vince Young: “That's his decision. That's his choice. The Tennessee Titans, we're out here working.”

Umpires Reject Minor Detail

On Monday, Major League Baseball Umpires rejected background checks. They will consider them. However, concessions are required. Is Major League Baseball stupid? Background checks are imperative. They are not a luxury. They are a necessity. Why are they not mandatory?

Jermaine O’Neal Detonates

Is Jermaine O’Neal stupid? Athletes cannot dictate scenarios. Ask Daunte Culpepper.

“It's time for me to move on. And the Lakers are the team I want Indiana to trade me to.”

“I love Indiana and the fans and we have a lot of nice young talent, but obviously [the Pacers are] in a situation now where they're rebuilding. I told them I can't be in a rebuilding mode right now. I'm at a point in my career where I can't wait another five years to contend. I'm not in a position physically to take in five years of losses and downtime.”

“Larry Bird is a hard man to deal with. He tries to make unfair trades. He wants to gut a team, but the Lakers are trying to get over the hump. I want Indiana to benefit, but with some nice young players and draft picks. I want to make it clear that I don't want to gut a team that I come to because then it'll be like I'm in Indiana all over again. If things don't work, I have an option in my contract next year and I will opt out and become a free agent.”

“Me and Kobe have talked a lot this summer about getting me here. We've been on each other since we were 15, playing AAU basketball, adidas All-American Camp, Nike All-American Camp. It's been a long relationship. We've been trying to make this happen all summer. He understands the desire that I have right now. Mentally, we're on the same page.”

“Kobe's in a position right now where he knows he needs some help. He's the world's best player, and he's got a good group of guys around him, but he needs somebody to come in there and give him some support. He knows I want to get back onto the court and prove the naysayers wrong.”

“If I'm [in LA], I'm going to help this team win a championship. We can get the Lakers to elite level. People need to realize that my last two years weren't down years. I didn't go into the last two seasons healthy at all. I'm healthy now and, at 28, I'm in my prime. The game is slowing down for me. I understand it a lot more. I'm ready to show people what I can do.”

“Kobe's been criticized unfairly. He's in a 'damned if you do, damned if you don't' situation. If he passes too much, they say he's not shooting. If he shoots, he's called selfish. He can go out and score 50 and lose, but if you don't take your shots, you're going to lose anyway. Everybody handles situations differently, and he handled the situation the best that he could. All in all, he wants to put out a team that can win. When you get into your 11th year, your body begins to wear down. You see the window of opportunity closing fast. I understand exactly what he's saying. That's what I told my team. That's why it's best for me to move on. Los Angeles and New Jersey would be my top two teams. I think L.A.'s a real possibility and I think New Jersey's a possibility, too.”

“I love L.A., my wife loves it, my daughter loves it. I tried not to come out here this year. I wanted to stay away from a lot of the talk because it's an emotional time for me to talk about being traded. I always told Reggie [Miller] I'd win a championship for him, and for whatever reason we've had some tough times up there [in Indiana]. But I thought if I came out here [to Los Angeles], it would help persuade me to make the decision that I need to make.”

The Daily Smak

Hey, didn’t you used to be driving number eighteen?

Britney Spears has a new agent. His objective? Managing the children.

During a study, children received similar food. The variation? McDonalds and ordinary packaging. Children chose McDonalds. Obviously, you can buy love.

Allies United

Presidents Bush & Karzai

NEW RULE

Legitimate candidates only.

Issues are important. However, morons dilute the process. Mike Gravel insulting soldiers, Dennis Kucinich screaming peace, Tom Tancredo vilifying immigrants… Anyone benefiting from this? These three and others are not candidates. They simply disrupt debates. They harm America. Mike, Dennis, and Tom, you are ridiculous. You cannot win. Promptly, shut up and exit.

Colorful Collins Commenting Again

On Tuesday, Bud Collins joined ESPN. Collins is a mercurial talent. He is both brilliant and insightful. Personally, I am elated Collins is returning. NBC should have never fired him.

Worth A Read

Die Hard Steel

Blogging the Pittsburgh Steelers. Excellent Hall of Fame Game feature.

The Big Five

For reasons good and bad… they were the news.

The Hot Five

A quintet of sizzling conversation starters.

The Daily Smak

The Mustang Ranch has reopened. Their first hiring? Paris Hilton.

This weekend, the New York Times sliced their size. Henceforth, Democrats receive additional coverage. Republicans still none.

Finally, I tip the ol’ ball cap to Tom Glavine and Alex Rodriguez. Their achievements are authentic.

Line of the Morning: Sound Bite Politics

During ABC’s This Week, the Republicans debated. George Stephanopoulos was an adequate host. Unfortunately, his format was cramped. Dialogue was diluted. Sound bites were disproportionate.

Amidst this recital, candidates flourished and floundered. Mayor Rudy Giuliani, Governor Mike Huckabee, and Senator John McCain were exemplary. McCain was stellar. Conversely, Governor Tommy Thompson, Senator Sam Brownback, and Congressman Ron Paul and Tom Tancredo were embarrassing. They should promptly withdraw.

Glavine Garners 300

On Sunday, Tom Glavine recorded his 300th victory. Glavine is an extraordinary competitor. He is also an exemplary individual. During his career, Glavine has tallied five twenty-plus win seasons. Simply stated, he is an icon. I congratulate him.

Following Fit, Gordon Gone

On Saturday, Robby Gordon flouted NASCAR. On Sunday, NASCAR parked him. Gordon’s actions were infantile. They were also unsurprising. Gordon is immature and unemployable. Four teams have fired him. In Montreal, Gordon embarrassed NASCAR. His penalties were warranted. I hope they expand.

Ochoa’s Uno Major

On Sunday, Lorena Ochoa conquered the British Open. Previously, Ochoa had accrued thirteen victories. For two years, she has been ranked number one. Everyone assumed majors. The question was when?

He Was The Case

Oliver Brown
(1907-2007)