Christmas Realism

On Friday, President Bush acted. Immediately, Chrysler and General Motors will receive $13.4 billion. In February, they will receive $4 billion.

President Bush’s decision is correct. America could not afford a collapse. Economic theory is idealistic and utopian. Economic reality is merciless. Republicans should realize this.

President Bush Complete Text

Betting the Pass Line (Last Week: 3-2 Season: 41-33)

Ravens at Cowboys (-4)
Both must win. The Cowboys will win.

Steelers (-1) at Titans
For AFC supremacy, the Steelers survive.

Cardinals at Patriots (-8)
In away contests, the Cardinals are 3-5. The Patriots will romp.

Falcons (+3) at Vikings
Michael Turner versus Adrian Peterson. Both amass one hundred yards. Both score. However, Matt Ryan wins the contest.

Panthers (+3) at Giants
For NFC supremacy, the Panthers prevail.

Betting the Pass Line (Season: 43-32)

EagleBank Bowl
Navy vs. Wake Forest (-3)
In the postseason, Navy has lost consecutive contests. On Saturday, Wake Forest equals three.

New Mexico Bowl
Fresno State (-3) vs. Colorado State
This season, Colorado State defeated New Mexico, Sacramento State, San Diego State, UNLV, and Wyoming. Favor Fresno State.

MagicJack St. Petersburg Bowl
Memphis (+11) vs. South Florida
Bowl season’s most intriguing pairing. For three quarters, they will skirmish. In the fourth quarter, South Florida survives.

Pioneer Las Vegas Bowl
BYU vs. Arizona (-3)
BYU commenced 6-0. Tonight, they will conclude 4-3.

R+L Carriers New Orleans Bowl
Troy (-4) vs. Southern Mississippi
Since 2001, Southern Mississippi has accrued seven consecutive bowl appearances. Troy has accrued two bowl appearances. Experience and success are not synonymous.

Appointments Accomplished

On Friday, President-Elect Obama announced Ray LaHood (Secretary of Transportation) and Hilda Solis (Secretary of Labor). “Whenever I have been asked how I measure the strength of the American economy, my answer is simple: jobs and wages,” said Obama. “I know we will be headed in the right direction again when we are creating jobs, instead of losing them, and when Americans are gaining ground in terms of their incomes, instead of treading water or falling behind. Today, I’m announcing several other appointees who will play an integral role in our efforts to turn our economy around: Congresswoman Hilda Solis as Secretary of Labor; former Congressman Ray LaHood as Secretary of Transportation… Together with the appointees I’ve already announced, these leaders will help craft a 21st Century Economic Recovery Plan, with the goal of creating two and a half million new jobs and strengthening our economy for the future.”

President-Elect Obama’s cabinet is complete. Three Governors, three Senators, two Representatives, three Hispanics, two Asian-Americans, one African-American, two Republicans, and two women are included. Every ideology is represented. During his campaign, President-Elect Obama promised pragmatism. Liberals must realize he was sincere.

President-Elect Obama Complete Text

NEW RULE

Race is sacred.

Charles Barkley: “I think race was the No. 1 factor. You can say it's not about race, but you can't compare the two résumés and say [Chizik] deserved the job. Out of all the coaches they interviewed, Chizik probably had the worst résumé.”

Concerning Chizik, Barkley and I concur. His hiring is a joke. With that stated, Barkley’s insinuation is ridiculous. Race was irrelevant. Auburn is simply incompetent.

Racism remains prevalent. Thus, race should not be trivialized. When this occurs, actual victims are marginalized. Their recovery protracts.

Faux Trade

On Saturday, Iowa State hired Auburn Defensive Coordinator Paul Rhoads. Essentially, Auburn and Iowa State swapped coaches. Neither will profit.

“In the Country of Baseball”

Dock Ellis
(1945-2008)

Monologue Joke of the Evening

“I hope things go better for Santa this year — last year he was shot down over Alaska by Sarah Palin.”

Late Show with David Letterman

Blagojevich: I Will Not Quit

Governor Rod Blagojevich Complete Text

Monologue Joke of the Evening

“It was so cold in Beverly Hills… and not only here — it was so cold in Chicago, Governor Blagojevich tried to sell Senate seat warmers.”

The Tonight Show

Deep Throat

Mark Felt
(1913-2008)

NEW RULE

No more pregnancy pictures.

You have added forty pounds. Your eating is obscene. Avoid the camera. You made offspring. Dogs make offspring. You are not special.

Worth A Read

Christmas Blog

Featuring ideas and tips.

The Daily Smak

Hey, didn’t you used to be Las Vegas?

On Thursday, Caroline Kennedy and Al Sharpton enjoyed lunch. Implausible combination. Barack Obama and Hillary Clinton labeled them “odd.”

Today’s top five or this weekend’s attractions (1) Panthers at Giants, (2) Steelers at Titans, (3) Ravens at Cowboys, (4) St. Petersburg Bowl, (5) Las Vegas Bowl

Las Vegas Freezes Over

Monologue Joke of the Evening

“President Bush announced that before he leaves office he wants to visit the poorest regions of the world. Any place where people can’t afford to buy shoes.”

The Tonight Show

Candidate Kennedy

The Daily Smak

Hey, didn’t you used to be OPEC?

For popularity, President Bush did not sell his soul. He attempted every day…

Today’s top five or Super Bowl favorites (1) Panthers, (2) Colts, (3) Jets, (4) Steelers, (5) Giants

Obama Injects Cabinet Triad

On Tuesday, President-Elect Obama announced Arne Duncan (Secretary of Education). “When it comes to school reform, Arne is the most hands-on of hands-on practitioners,” said Obama. “For Arne, school reform isn’t just a theory in a book – it’s the cause of his life. And the results aren’t just about test scores or statistics, but about whether our children are developing the skills they need to compete with any worker in the world for any job.”

On Wednesday, President-Elect Obama announced Ken Salazar (Secretary of Interior) and Tom Vilsack (Secretary of Agriculture). “With the appointments I announced earlier this week, and those I am announcing today, I am confident that we have the team we need to make the rural agenda America’s agenda, to create millions of new green jobs, to free our nation from its dependence on oil, and to help preserve this planet for our children,” said Obama. “In the end, that is not only our responsibility as Americans, it is our obligation as stewards of God’s Earth.”

Theoretically, President-Elect Obama, Rahm Emanuel (Chief of Staff), David Axelrod (Senior Advisor), Ellen Moran (Communications Director), and Robert Gibbs (Press Secretary) pronounce policy. Cabinet Secretaries are spokesman. Truthfully, Cabinet Secretaries assess vital information. They are important voices.

President-Elect Obama Complete Text (Tuesday)

President-Elect Obama Complete Text (Wednesday)

Survivor Fifty-Seven

Following Kenny’s elimination (4-1 vote), the final four constructed a card house. Sue garnered immunity. Pre-tribal council, the circumstances were obvious. Bob and Matty would tie. They did (2-2 vote). Bob won the tiebreaker.

During the final council, Bob, Sue, and Sugar were criticized and questioned. Thus, the vote was open. Bob amassed four votes. Sue accrued three. Sugar acquired zero.

Overall, this season was excellent. While our reviews were abridged, the format was splendid. The casting was superb. The venue was superior. Once again, Survivor stated the obvious. They are one of television’s finest. Human drama trumps all.

O-Feckless

On Wednesday, OPEC reduced production. OPEC can scream. They cannot mandate profit.

Slingin’ Sammy

Sammy Baugh
(1914-2008)

Monologue Joke of the Evening

“Rough weather in a lot of the country. Ice storms in the Northeast, cold snap in the Midwest. In fact, it was so cold in Chicago, Gov. Blagojevich actually had his hand in his own pockets.”

The Tonight Show

2009 Pro Bowl Starters

AFC

QB: Peyton Manning (Colts)
RB: Thomas Jones (Jets)
FB: Le'Ron McClain (Ravens)
WR: Andre Johnson (Texans)
T: Joe Thomas (Browns)
G: Alan Faneca (Jets)
C: Kevin Mawae (Titans)
G: Kris Dielman (Chargers)
T: Jason Peters (Bills)
TE: Tony Gonzalez (Chiefs)
WR: Brandon Marshall (Broncos)

DE: Dwight Freeney (Colts)
DT: Albert Haynesworth (Titans)
DT: Kris Jenkins (Jets)
DE: Mario Williams (Texans)
LB: James Harrison (Steelers)
LB: Ray Lewis (Ravens)
LB: Joey Porter (Dolphins)
CB: Nnamdi Asomugha (Raiders)
FS: Ed Reed (Ravens)
SS: Troy Polamalu (Colts)
CB: Cortland Finnegan (Titans)

NFC

QB: Kurt Warner (Cardinals)
RB: Adrian Peterson (Vikings)
FB: Mike Sellers (Redskins)
WR: Larry Fitzgerald (Cardinals)
T: Jordan Gross (Panthers)
G: Chris Snee (Giants)
C: Andre Gurode (Cowboys)
G: Steve Hutchinson (Vikings)
T: Walter Jones (Seahawks)
TE: Jason Witten (Cowboys)
WR: Anquan Boldin (Cardinals)

DE: Julius Peppers (Panthers)
DT: Kevin Williams (Vikings)
DT: Jay Ratliff (Cowboys)
DE: Justin Tuck (Giants)
LB: Lance Briggs (Bears)
LB: Patrick Willis (49ers)
LB: DeMarcus Ware (Cowboys)
CB: Charles Woodson (Packers)
FS: Nick Collins (Packers)
SS: Adrian Wilson (Cardinals)
CB: Antoine Winfield (Vikings)

NEW RULE

Padraig Harrington was spectacular.

On Tuesday, Harrington garnered PGA Player of the Year. Tiger Woods’ absence is irrelevant. Harrington won the British Open. He won the PGA Championship. Greatness appraises major championships. Greatness ignores health hypotheticals

Last year, I proposed the Tiger Woods Award. I reaffirm my opinion. Woods is exemplary. However, Harrington’s campaign was superb. He warranted this reward.

Worth A Read

Black Shoe Diaries

Blogging the Penn State Nittany Lions.

The Daily Smak

Hey, didn’t you used to be Auburn?

According to Secretary of Treasury Henry Paulson, financial institutions have stabilized. I’m reassured…

Today’s top five or Joe Paterno’s finest (1) John Cappelletti, (2) Jack Ham, (3) Lavar Arrington, (4) Shane Conlan, (5) Larry Johnson

Save Populi

On Tuesday, the Federal Reserve sliced the benchmark interest rate. Subsequently, the Dow Jones Industrial Average soared 359.61 points. Consumer credit remains frozen. How will interest rates alter this?

Monologue Joke of the Evening

“President Bush was in Baghdad at a press conference, and a reporter jumped up and started heaving shoes at him. He was screaming, “Here’s your farewell kiss, you dog.” That’s the same goodbye I got from NBC.”

Late Show with David Letterman

Dallas Stars: “Good Luck Sean, Get Out Sean”

On December 5, Sean Avery was suspended for six contests. On Sunday, the Dallas Stars released him. According to General Manager Brett Hull, the relationship was impossible. “I honestly believe the issues that Sean had really kind of festered when he came to Dallas and things didn't work out for him as he had planned, as we had planned,” said Hull. “But I think a lot of those things were brought on by himself. It's a two-way street. You have to be accepted, but you have to do everything you can to be accepted. It was just a bad situation.”

During his career, Avery has amassed 68 goals, 109 assists, and 177 points. In 2008, he registered three goals, seven assists, and ten points. “We don't want to ruin Sean or his career,” said Hull. “We want him to get better. The team needs to move on and start winning and he needs to take care of himself. ... As a hockey player, I think there's no question he can be an asset. That said, he's got to fix the demons he has. It becomes such a huge distraction that it almost takes away from his ability to play the game.”

Hull’s words are insincere. Avery should recover? Employment would aid recovery. Essentially, Hull provided an addict money. He revoked his shelter. Hull’s actions are repugnant. His ignorance is unacceptable.

NEW RULE

Class is immeasurable.

During his career, Warrick Dunn has registered 2,650 carries, 10,910 yards, and 49 touchdowns. He has also recorded 504 receptions, 4,316 yards, and 15 touchdowns. He has never craved attention. He has never sought headlines. Dunn is not an elite performer. He is an exemplary person. When he retires, voters should remember this. They should reward his example.

The Daily Smak

Hey, didn’t you used to be Sacramento Kings Coach?

In Peru, police seized cocaine. From a manure shipment, three tons were confiscated. Nose candy has been redefined.

Today’s top five or potential New York Senators (1) Caroline Kennedy, (2) Andrew Cuomo, (3) Steve Israel, (4) Thomas Suozzi, (5) Kirsten Gillibrand

Obama’s Refrain: Energy Reform

On Monday, President-Elect Obama announced Steven Chu (Secretary of Energy) and Lisa Jackson (EPA Administrator). “In the next few years, the choices that we make will help determine the kind of country – and world – that we will leave to our children and grandchildren,” said Obama. “All of us know the problems rooted in our addiction to foreign oil – it constrains our economy, shifts wealth to hostile regimes, and leaves us dependent on unstable regions. These urgent dangers are eclipsed only by the long-term threat of climate change, which – unless we act – will lead to drought and famine abroad, devastating weather patterns and terrible storms on our shores, and the disappearance of our coastline at home.”

Since 1979, energy has been academic. Elected officials acknowledge the problem. They propose solutions. Their study subsides. Clearly, Obama’s mindset is dissimilar.

President-Elect Obama Complete Text

Bradford’s Visual Victory

On Saturday, Sam Bradford garnered the Heisman Trophy. Bradford, the accolade’s second consecutive sophomore recipient, registered 1,726 points (300 first place votes). Colt McCoy recorded 1,640 points (266 first place votes). Tim Tebow racked 1,575 (309 first place votes).

In 2008, Bradford completed 302 of 442 passes for 4,464 yards and 48 touchdowns. Upon receiving his reward, Bradford was shocked. “I was definitely surprised and I think it's everything I imagined,” he said. “I think it will take a couple weeks to set in.”

Leadership is imperative. Statistics are impressive. Following Florida’s lone loss, Tebow pledged improvement. He tossed 22 touchdowns. Following Oklahoma’s lone loss, Bradford remained silent. He tossed 25 touchdowns. Leadership is not merely words.

Clown Correction: Sacramento Tosses Theus

On Monday, the Sacramento Kings fired Coach Reggie Theus. Assistant Coach Kenny Natt supplanted him. “When you look at the overall level of performance that we've experienced this year, it's just not where we want to be,” said President Geoff Petrie. “Sometimes you just need to try a different voice if you want to try and change things. It's not about just any one game.”

During his tenure, Theus accrued a 44-62 record. Upon his firing, the Kings stood 6-18. Theus’ failure was predictable.

Is Auburn Serious?

On Monday, Auburn hired Iowa State Coach Gene Chizik. “Nobody's expectation that is a fan of Auburn University is higher than mine,” said Chizik. “That sums it up. My expectations are very high. I understand that the people of this place, including myself, they want championships. That's my expectation of myself. That's what I take with me to sleep with every night.”

During his Iowa State tenure (2 seasons), Chizik accrued a 5-19 record. Tommy Tuberville merits an apology. Chizik is a pathetic joke.

Lauren, Heidi Blend Emotional, Unbelievable

In parallel universes, Heidi and Lauren exist. Heidi’s emotions are contrived and superficial. Her interactions are manipulative. Her moments are perverse. Lauren’s emotions are cordial and genuine. Her interactions are meditative. Her moments are poignant.

In Los Angeles, Audrina, Lauren, Lo, and Whitney said adieu. Memories were shared. Tears were shed. Akin to Alex, Jessica, and Kristin, Lauren and Whitney huddled and sobbed. For her ally, Lauren wished success. For herself, she sobbed.

In Cabo San Lucas, Heidi and Spencer canoodled. They enjoyed tequila. They married. Given US Weekly’s cover, these nuptials were inevitable. With that stated, I must ask the obvious. Again. Heidi, you ignorant slut, what were you thinking?

GAME BALLS (NFL Edition)

Jason Avant (WR – Eagles): 5 receptions, 101 yards
(Win: 3-10 vs. Browns)

Andre Johnson (WR – Texans): 11 receptions, 207 yards, 1 td
(Win: 13-12 vs. Titans)

James Jones (WR – Packers): 4 receptions, 132 yards
(Loss: 20-16 at Jaguars)

Dennis Northcutt (WR – Jaguars): 5 receptions, 127 yards, 1 td
(Win: 20-16 vs. Packers)

Adrian Peterson (RB – Vikings): 28 carries, 165 yards
(Win: 35-14 at Cardinals)

Steve Smith (WR – Panthers): 9 receptions, 165 yards, 1 td
(Win: 30-10 vs. Broncos)

Michael Turner (RB – Falcons): 32 carries, 152 yards, 1 td
(Win: 13-10 vs. Buccaneers)

Hines Ward (WR – Steelers): 8 receptions, 107 yards
(Win: 13-9 at Ravens)

Why Caddies Should Never Speak

Steve Williams: “I wouldn't call [Phil] Mickelson a great player, 'cause I hate the [expletive]. I don't particularly like the guy. He pays me no respect at all and hence I don't pay him any respect. It's no secret we don't get along either.”

Phil Mickelson: “After seeing Steve Williams' comments all I could think of was how lucky I am to have a class act like Bones [Caddie Jim MacKay] on my bag and representing me.”

Tiger Woods: “I was disappointed to read the comments attributed to Steve Williams about Phil Mickelson, a player that I respect. It was inappropriate. The matter has been discussed and dealt with.”

NEW RULE

David Gregory is objectionable.

Tim Russert is an irreplaceable icon. With that stated, Gregory is an inappropriate successor. Russert was vigilant. He was never vile. Gregory is the exact opposite. Once again, NBC has embraced public expiration. This is unfortunate.

Worth A Read

Political Base

Connecting money, media, and politics.

The Daily Smak

Hey, didn’t you used to be Philadelphia 76ers Coach?

This weekend, “The Day the Earth Stood Still” amassed $31 million. This afternoon, a sequel was announced. Starring Governor Rod Blagojevich, “The Week Illinois Stood Still.”

Today’s top five or favorite shoes (1) Nike, (2) Adidas, (3) Reebok, (4) Puma, (5) New Balance

Throwing Their Displeasure

The Big Five

For reasons good and bad… they were the news.

The Hot Five

A quintet of sizzling conversation starters.

Annika Sorenstam Concludes Career

Annika Sorenstam: “I felt at peace walking up the 18th hole. I really felt very content. I saw some players standing behind the 18th green; that gave me a tear. I saw my parents and my family and that gave me a tear. Life goes on. I am very happy about my decision to move on. I feel very happy [with my achievements] and at the same time if you think about 15 years and all of the things that I have achieved, it's sad.”

“But you close the door and you open another one. I am glad that I have a chance to do that. I have the option to do that. Never say never. But, on the other hand, I feel great right now. This is what I have been waiting for. There is a lot of talent out there. I feel very good about women's golf, in general. It's on the rise and it will continue to grow. I think stepping away at this time is very appropriate.”

Line of the Morning

Debbie Stabenow (D-MI)

“Every other country in the world that has an automaker presence is stepping up to help them get through that because they know it's critical to their economy, it's critical to jobs, and it's critical to their national defense. So far, we're the only ones in America that have not understood that and stepped up.”