Subtle, Scorching Drama

Following offseason turbulence, continual screaming was anticipated. Fireworks were assumed. Unfortunately, the Hills was subdued. Only one catfight occurred. The tabloid drama was barely discussed. With that stated, the premiere was excellent. Despite the subtly, the climax was stellar. Once again, the Hills showcased brilliance. The program provided cuddly heroines and reprehensible villains.

During the initial moments, Heidi and Lauren were separated. Lauren previewed the rumors. Heidi parceled housewarming invitations. After Lauren skipped the party, the two clashed. Heidi denied spreading rumors. Lauren drunkenly hurled accusations. The pair’s skirmish was delicious. Post fight, Santa Barbara relaxed Heidi. Lauren escaped into Laguna Beach.

Heidi and Spencer were nauseating. Heidi was repugnant. Her innocence was revolting. Concerning Spencer, he repainted their apartment and purchased a ring. On Santa Barbara’s beach, he proposed. Heidi accepted. America’s dysfunctional couple engaged? Thankfully, Brody was rational.

Despite a checkered history, Audrina and Justin reunited. They canoodled, enjoyed dinner, and rode his motorcycle. They also enjoyed Forty Deuce tickets. Tickets which were Audrina and Lauren’s. A bitch’s history repeating? Justin is unsavory. He is destructive. Another Spencer is not needed.

Last season, I predicted Whitney’s dismissal. I was wrong. She is now Lauren’s boss. Thankfully, her speaking has increased. She even exchanged Teen Vogue and Les Deux. Upon Whitney’s arrival, Lauren showcased her British pal. Lauren drunk and rambling? Intriguing television.

Overall, the premiere was exemplary. MTV’s music was superb. Particularly, their Fergie and Rihanna overlays. The tabloids are rapid. They explode news. The Hills crafted circumstances. Instant gratification was not enjoyed. However, observe the previews. Drama will ensue.