The Daily Smak

On Sunday, (would, could, should have been Mexican President) Andres Manuel Lopez Obrador staged a rally. Thousands attended and cheered. Viva Al Gore!

Tennessee has instituted universal carding. According to Governor Phil Bredesen, the law will combat underage drinking. I am not the smartest person (shaddup!). How will carding seventy-year-old’s prevent illegal consumption?

Barry Bonds has requested additional security. Allegedly, fans rushing the field concerns him. Relax, Beef Roids. Do not consider them fans. Consider them potential grand jurors.