Failure Indulges University

Isiah Thomas’ legacy is both fact and fiction. Thomas’ career was prolific. Actually, he averaged only nineteen points per contest. Thomas possesses basketball intellect. Actually, he razed New York’s roster. Thomas’ image is salvageable. Actually, Thomas is a pariah, racist, and sexual harasser.

On Tuesday, Florida International hired Thomas. “I like rolling up my sleeves,” said Thomas. “I like taking some from the bottom and building it to the top. There's a lot of risk in that and there is also a lot of reward in that. But that's how I grew up. I want to take FIU to the next level and I know it's going to take a lot of hard work, but I'm willing to pay the price to do that.”

President Modesto Maidique’s reaction was ecstatic. “This is bigger than basketball and bigger than athletics,” he said. “Having a nationally recognized coach like Isiah at FIU will have a positive impact on our university as a whole, helping us achieve additional national exposure.”

During his career, Thomas has amassed a 187-223 record. In Indiana (3 seasons), he racked a 131-115 record. In New York (2 seasons), he registered a 56-108 record. “I think we're still realizing how big this is for us,” said Athletic Director Pete Garcia. “We still don't realize how big this is, how much knowledge and skills he can offer us and how much he can help us take this school to another level, take this school to where we are supposed to be.”

According to New York Knicks President Donnie Walsh, Thomas could succeed. “I think it's a great thing for him and it's kind of what I wanted for him from the day I let him go,” said Walsh. “If you really think about it, some of these kids that are coming out of AAU that are going to go to college for one year, that's a pretty good sell. Come down to Miami, spend a year with me.' I think he's positioned to do well with recruiting there.”

Thomas has been an apocryphal analyst, an execrable executive, and a miscreant mentor. For Florida International, I cannot envision success.