American Idol: Chubby Sacked

Chris Sligh has been eliminated. Despite considering Phil Stacey and Haley Scarnato, America made the correct decision. Sligh’s performance was horrific. He obliterated “Every Little Thing.” His protestations were also pathetic. The downbeat was unusual? This song was unknown? No, Chris. Your performance was terrible. Your ouster was deserved.

Simply stated, your act subsided. Chris, your act was never appealing. Ridiculous pictorial poses. Revolting answers. Playing bongos in your boxer shorts? Enough with the searing mental images. You are a morbidly obese gorilla. Your dancing, your singing, your person should never air again. You did not bring chubby back. You showcased why chubby is unappealing. Disappear. Enjoy your wife, who was either stupid or drugged when you proposed.